


Written In The Scars Of Our Hearts

by MsDamia



Series: There Is Gonna Be A Flame [2]
Category: Captain America, Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (2012), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Assistant Darcy Lewis, Awesome Darcy Lewis, BAMF Phil Coulson, Bruce Banner & Natasha Ramanov are Twister Champions, Bucky Barnes Returns, Character Death, Character Death Fix, Crying, Darcy Lewis's Taser, Drama, Drunk Natasha, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, F/M, Fix-It, Fury Gets Tazed, Gen, Healing, Heartbreak, Hospitals, Jane Foster Super!Science, Manipulative Nick Fury, Moving On, Nick Fury Lies, Past Natasha Ramanov/Bucky Barnes, Phil Coulson's Cellist, Phil Coulson's Trading Card Collection, Protective Pepper, Protective Phil Coulson, Protective Tony Stark, Rage, Science Bros, winter soldier - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-06
Updated: 2013-06-17
Packaged: 2017-11-28 11:18:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 29,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/673799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MsDamia/pseuds/MsDamia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The continuing story of Darcy, the Cellist, and how she and her mad scientist moved into Avengers tower to open a bridge to another world and maybe heal some heartbreak along the way. It is also the story of how a doctor stood up to the director of SHIELD to care for a patient who would have been of better political use if he really had died.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. When You’re Gone, I Wanna Go Too

Darcy was walking in fog. She had been for the last month, ever since she’d found out about Phil. It had only taken a couple hours for Tony Stark to tell Jane they would fund her research one hundred percent so long as she moved into Stark Tower. Jane had looked around the damaged building and agreed. It had taken Pepper Potts less than four days to have all the proper paperwork signed and all of their belongings moved into the tower. It took another week for most of the damage done to the building to be repaired enough to make it livable and for the two women to move into the suites that had been designated for them in the upstairs “Avenger” portion of the tower.

Darcy had always been a vivacious girl; loud, playful, friendly. She was a force of nature and it was a big part of what had attracted Agent Phil Coulson to her in the first place. People who hadn’t known her before the Invasion didn’t know that though, all they could see was a slow, quiet, distracted young woman who seemed to zone out at odd times. She was working with a brilliant scientist and Tony Stark himself seemed to hover, so the SI staff let her oddities go and chalked it up to brilliance that had yet to show itself to the peons. The SHIELD Agents tried not to look at her even as they gossiped behind her back. Phil Coulson had been a legend after all, and this young woman had been his for all intents and purposes. 

Darcy spent her time making sure that her scientists were fed and watered, easily adding Tony and Bruce to the list just under Jane. If Phil wasn’t here to take care of Tony then Darcy might as well. When Jane opened the Rainbow Einstein Bridge or whatever to Thor-land things were going to change even more. Someone needed to be on top of it, someone that wasn’t Nick Fury because he had an agenda and those people didn’t need anyone else telling them when to move and where to go. 

She wasn’t deaf, dumb, or blind for all that sometimes she appeared to be, so she was pretty up to date on the rumor mill as well. She’d never been much for quiet, that had been Phil’s shtick, but she was starting to see its upside. People simply didn’t expect her to be paying attention when she wasn’t looking at them. She could open a book and stare at the same word for twenty minutes and know everything that was being said around her. Things like Phil being the one put in charge of the Avengers Initiative or Mary down in accounting having an affair with Bryan from HR. SHIELD agents were some of the worst gossips in the cafeteria.

The brunette dressed in her usual thrift-shop chic ensemble that morning; jeans, t-shirt, oversized boyfriend sweater, and keds. Then she pulled her hair up high on her head, wrapping it into a loose bun before heading to the kitchen. So far the only people that lived in the Tower were herself, Tony, Pepper, Bruce, and Jane. Two more were expected within the week, Hawkeye and Black Widow, as SHIELD was officially assigning them to the Avengers Initiative and Stark Tower. There was still no set date for Steve Rogers to be showing up, the man was exploring the changes in his world out in Brooklyn. Not that anyone was supposed to know that, but Tony liked to keep an eye on his team and he didn’t mind answering all of Darcy’s questions. Not that he would ever admit to caring about any of them.

She started a pot of coffee, knowing the no one else was going to be awake at half past five in the morning. Not unless they had been up all night working on some kind of science project and Darcy had chased them all out of their labs twice last night, she didn’t usually have to do it a third. It was something about puppy eyes and not wanting to make her worry. Maybe it was the dark circles around her own eyes? It didn’t matter, whatever worked could continue to work as far as she was concerned. The coffee finished and she poured two cups. She stirred two teaspoons of sugar into one and left the other one bitter and black. She walked both cups over to the far table and left the one with sugar in front of a picture of Phil. Her very own little shrine, pitiful as it was. 

“He was a good man.” The voice was unfamiliar and made her shriek, turning and throwing the cup full of scalding liquid at the person before she’d even entirely realized that the voice belonged to a stranger. A stranger who should not have been able to get into the living quarters without Tony’s or Pepper’s permission. She had Phil’s coffee in her hands now and stared wide-eyed at the tall blond in front of her.

“Who the hell are you?” Her voice was high pitched and extremely loud in the open air of the large room Tony insisted on calling the breakfast nook. The man winced a bit as he pulled a now stained shirt away from his body, the broken pieces of the mug strewn about his feet.

“Darcy?” Pepper’s voice was calm, despite the background of a laughing Tony. Darcy turned dark blue eyes on the redhead and then back to the tall man in front of her. It took a few seconds to relax her shoulders and then set the mug in her hands carefully back in front of Phil’s photo.

“I didn’t mean to startle you,” Steve Rogers told her a few minutes later as Tony made sea-weed smoothie (it wasn’t actually made with seaweed, it just looked like it was) and Pepper sat at the island, her long legs crossed neatly at the knee. Steve was now in a new shirt and Darcy had a fresh cup of coffee in her hands after cleaning up the mess she’d made.

“It’s alright,” Darcy waved him off, chuckling a bit as she imagined what they must have looked like to Tony and Pepper. “Besides, it’s not everyone that can say they attacked Captain America and got away with it.” The wry twist of her lips grew into more of a smirk, “Far fewer can claim they got to see him strip afterwards.” She added.

“He blushes, isn’t it darling?” Tony came up to her side and tossed an arm over her shoulders, staring at the other man like a doting aunt. Darcy sighed and shook her head as she looked up at the man, affection on her face. Tony was something else, that was for sure. Underneath all the ego and swagger was someone who considered very few people to be his real friends and who was ridiculously loyal once you were in.

“Be nice you two.” Pepper told them, her own mouth quirked up a bit as she tried not to smile at the man’s antics. Tony was interrupted in the midst of opening his mouth for a retort by a tiny whirlwind that dashed through the kitchen and straight to the coffee pot. Darcy pulled out a package of pop-tarts and held it out, a bored expression on her face as the petite scientist snatched it and dashed back out, heading for the elevator.

“What was that?” Steve asked after a moment.

“Mad scientist in the midst of a thought that will probably toss current laws of physics out the door,” Darcy replied evenly, taking another sip of her blessedly bitter brew. Steve stared at her and Tony, the other man having draped himself over the curvy brunette. Then he turned a cautious look of confusion to Pepper who sent him a rueful look in return and nodded the affirmative.

“Good to know.” Steve said, blinking a bit as he wrapped his mind around that bit of information.

“You’ll be fine so long as you never take the last of the coffee.” Darcy promised, detaching herself from Tony and refilling her own cup. She sent Steve a wink and made her way after Jane, she would be needed for her boss skills at spreadsheets and data analysis. Tony finished his smoothie and went to pour himself a cup of coffee, only to find the carafe was empty. He sent a dirty look after the girl and went about starting a new pot.

“So she’s the exception to the coffee rule?” Steve asked, an amused smile on his lips.

“Darcy is the exception to most rules.” Tony responded, sharing a quick glanced with Pepper.

“What is it that she does?” Steve asked, settling in for a nice chat.

“She’s … hard to explain.” Tony informed him, a frown on his face as he pressed a distracted kiss to Pepper’s cheek and took off as well. Pepper smiled sadly after him, pain clear in her eyes.

“I didn’t mean to upset him.” Steve said quietly, looking at the poised redhead.

“Darcy is Jane’s assistant. I’ve been informed that she is on schedule to take over most of the R&D labs, not that she is actively aware of her actions. Jarvis and Jane are keeping an eye on her.” Pepper smiled, a fondness washing over her as she thought about the girl that had become quite a close friend after crying her heart out on Pepper’s shoulder.

“Something other than the average assistant, I take it.” It was a statement, not a question. Steve might have been sleeping for seventy plus years, but he was pretty sharp.

“She and Agent Coulson were very close for a little over two years,” Pepper didn’t add that she was fragile. That she was different from how Phil had explained the girl to Pepper and maybe Darcy was more than a little broken at the moment. Steve’s jaw clenched as his fingers tightened around his cup. He hadn’t known Phil Coulson as well as the others, but he had known just enough to label the man a hero. A man of his position didn’t trust easily, and that meant Darcy must have been special indeed.

A few hours later Darcy had failed to chase Jane out of her lab and instead brought her coffee and a sandwich. She made her way to Tony’s lab, easily identified by the music you could feel pulsing through the floor before you got near the door. Thankfully Darcy enjoyed her music at about the same ear-piercing volume, so it was easy to hide in a corner. She typed in the code she’d been given weeks ago and flopped into a swivel chair, watching the manic movements of her second favorite genius as he designed … something. She had no idea what it was, probably a small part of something larger that would change the world and make it a better place. She ignored him in favor of one of his creations. Dum-E was making his way forward and Darcy pulled a hard, red rubber ball out of her pocket.

It was almost twenty minutes before Tony noticed that his labs had been invaded and that was only because Dum-E dropped the ball (literally) and it bounced into the man’s foot. Tony opened his mouth to yell and then paused as he noticed the rubber ball. He looked behind him and found an amused Darcy smirking as she sat on the floor, back against the glass wall. Dum-E grabbed the ball and zipped back over to Darcy, dropping it in her lap and then backing up a few feet. Its little arm bobbed up and down as it waited for the girl to throw the ball.

“Did you teach my robot to play fetch?” Tony asked, blinking and unsure if he should be offended or amused.

“He likes it,” Darcy shrugged and tossed the ball. Tony eyeballed her and then the robot.

“How’d you figure that out?” Tony was honestly curious now as he watched Dum-E bring Darcy the ball once more.

“I was having a day and Dum-E was being helpful,” Darcy shrugged. She wouldn’t tell him that she’d wandered down to his labs, grabbed a hammer, and started pounding out her grief and frustration on a piece of junk metal that he usually used for target practice. She’d thrown the hammer when she realized she wasn’t making herself feel better and Dum-E had brought it back. In her frustration she’d thrown it again and Dum-E had brought it to her once more. She might have cried on the robot like it was some kind of loveable dog at that point, but if Jarvis hadn’t taken video footage she could pretend it didn’t actually happen.

“Having a day? Seriously? You can’t even come up with a proper descriptor? I’m disappointed Lewis.” Tony walked over and sat beside her, sliding slowly down the glass. He smelled a little like motor oil and the expensive cologne he favored. The girl rested her head on his shoulder as he settled down and he accepted the ball from Dum-E, throwing it hard across the room. They were silent for a long time before Darcy decided to speak.

“I seem to be angry a lot, this last month. I’ve never really been an angry person, despite my penchant for tazing first and asking questions later.” Her tone was light, conversational. It wouldn’t have worked on anyone else, but Tony understood Darcy perhaps better than most others. They had a lot of similarities when all was said and done.

“Anger is healthy, or at least that’s what people used to tell me. It’s still frowned on, but it’s normal.” Tony shrugged and Darcy tucked herself in closer to his side. If someone had told her six weeks ago that she’d be taking comfort from Tony Stark himself, she’d have laughed in their face and accused them of not sharing the good stuff. Now, though, it seemed normal. He and the team were really the only ones that seemed to understand that nothing in the world was right. At least nothing in her world.

“People are stupid. Nick Fury is the stupidest.” Darcy muttered, watching the ball fly and Dum-E chase after it gleefully. Tony chuckled, enjoying the idea of Darcy saying that to the man’s face. She would too, given half a chance. Darcy did not deal well with intimidation. If she felt intimidated it just made her hackles rise and her tazer appear in hand.

“I need a drink,” Tony informed the girl, handing the ball to Dum-E and standing. He held a hand out to the brunette and Darcy took it, giggling when Tony leered at the low cut nature of her shirt. 

“Hello there ladies,” He waggled his eyebrows, eyes locked on her cleavage.

“You’re incorrigible.” Darcy informed him as they walked to the elevators.

“You love it,” Tony told her.

“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t.” Darcy responded, sticking out her tongue as they entered the elevators. “Maybe I’ll tell you if you get me drunk enough to think the world is made of sunshine.”

That night she was positive the world was made of sunshine, but the next morning she was equally positive that sunshine was actually evil.


	2. No More Ace To Play

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little peek into a secure medical facility.

“Your assessment last month was that he wouldn’t live through the night. You extended it to a week. Now he is in a healing coma and could wake up at any time. Do I have that correct?” Nick Fury was not amused. He had been given a fact by the doctors and had agreed to keep silent on the treatment of a well respected agent who had earned the right to privacy in his ending moments. Above all, Phillip Coulson was a private individual. 

“Yes sir, Director Fury.” The doctor in charge of Agent Coulsons care looked steadily into the Director’s lone eye. He had fought the director when the man had ordered him to pull the plug on the severely injured man. Fury had claimed it would have been kinder to end it sooner rather than draw it out. That might even have been true, but Doctor Corrigan had been with SHIELD going on thirty years now and he could see the political weights that were playing into the director’s decisions as much as the emotional ones.

“Will he be the same as he was before the incident?” Fury asked, his gaze going to the window that looked in on the unconscious form of what had been one of his best agents. The doctor continued to look at the director for a few moments before sighing softly and looking through the window as well.

“We won’t know until he wakes up.” The man admitted, his lips tightening into a frustrated frown. Fury turned his gaze back to the doctor.

“No visitors.” Fury announced after they had stared at one another for a few moments more. Doctor Corrigan wasn’t so easily cowed and he wasn’t about to back down over a patient. Fury had come down to their secure little facility because of the doctors request for visitation, saying it would benefit his patient to hear the words of friends and loved ones. Director Fury had thought it required a personal review. 

“Understood.” The doctors voice was clipped and Fury stared hard at him for a few more moments before turning to stride out of the room, leather coat flapping behind him. 

“Should have pulled his plug when we had the chance. This is going to be a pain in my ass.” The director growled. Doctor Corrigan sighed once more and looked through the window at Phil. He would need a lot of physical therapy, but there was no reason to think he wouldn’t pull through at this point. It was a miracle that the man had lasted this long, but they should have taken into account that he had a hell of a fighting spirit. Keeping the agent segregated, hidden and presumed dead, that wasn’t about respecting a man’s privacy. Doctor Corrigan wasn’t sure what it was about, but his job was to heal and he would. Even if it meant fighting his director every step of the way.


	3. I Don't Want To Rest In Peace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just another day in the life as one tries to move on.

Tony strode into Dr. Foster’s labs and immediately began poking and prodding at her machines, flipping open panels and looking at the insides that were sometimes, literally, held together with duct tape and a prayer to mechanical gods. The petite physicist did her best to ignore him for a few minutes, but he was _touching_ her _things_. 

“What do you want Tony?” She finally demanded, stepping away from her desk and striding toward him with a scowl. 

“I was ordered to take a break and figured I’d come pester your sad little mascot.” He shrugged a bit and then dodged to the left as a heavy black stapler came flying at his head. “What was that for!?” He was glad he’d been training so much, because that could have hurt and the dainty doctor had surprisingly good aim.

“Do not make fun of her pain.” Jane was almost quivering with rage, her eyes glaring at the man. Tony had very likely not meant any kind of harm by his remark, part of her was very aware that he actually liked Darcy far more than he liked most people. She was feeling very protective of the younger woman though, something that didn’t happen often with Jane for the simple fact that she didn’t connect with very many people. 

“I’m not making fun of her pain, I’m …” Tony didn’t know how to put his feelings into words. He spoke more than should; at least that was what Pepper liked to tell him. He talked about his ideas and people’s failings and his own genius. He talked about everything that meant nothing, those things that held meaning though. Those weren’t voiced. Not often at least. How much he loved Pepper, how much he had respected Phil, how he had practically adopted a whole other science department that he hadn’t before studied just so that he could keep Darcy near. Darcy had held a giant part of Phil in her petite little hands and having her was like having a part of Phil no one else got to see. How did you say all that out loud without sounding like a cheese-ball though? Or an obsessive stalker?

“What Tony is trying to say is that he cares very much for Darcy and would never do anything to upset her.” The calm voice behind them distracted both scientists for a moment. Pepper’s eyes were compassionate as she smiled sadly at Tony and he smiled softly back. She always understood everything that he couldn’t put into words. 

“Well he should work on his delivery.” Jane scowled but the rage was quickly dissipating. Sometimes you’d catch the genius looking at the SI CEO like she was the only person in the world. Such intimate looks sometimes made her feel like she was intruding on a private moment. It wasn’t sexual (though he looked at the redhead like that as well) it was more a softness that you never saw otherwise. 

“He should also work on following directions.” Peppers eyes narrowed as she focused on the man that was suddenly standing up straighter and tucking his hands into the pockets of his jeans, his face looking a touch defensive. 

“I know that Jarvis reminded you of the chair holder’s meeting.” Pepper told the man. This argument was commonplace between the two and Jane felt like less of an intruder. 

“Get him out of my lab before I throw another stapler.” Jane told the other woman before turning and going back to the numbers she’d been running before she’d been interrupted. 

“Are we throwing office equipment now? Is that a thing?” Darcy’s voice was amused as she came through the door, two large coffee cups in her hands. 

“Ooh, is that from Harriet’s?” Tony was moving forward and the brunette twisted away from him.

“Not for you Mr. “I’m too good to get my own coffee”, this one is for Jane.” Darcy made a wide circle around to her boss as Pepper raised a hand to cover a smile.

“Hey! I-“ Tony was cut off.

“Resemble that remark? I’m aware.” Her flat tone of voice made Tony pause and Pepper snort. All eyes turned to the redhead and her face turned bright as she attempted not to laugh any more.

“Traitor.” There wasn’t any heat to back Tony’s accusation, in fact there was a bit of a twinkle to his eye.

“Get out, you’re upsetting my scientist.” Darcy made shooing motions at Tony and Pepper hurried out the door ahead of him. 

“Is that a Mexican mocha?” Jane arched her eyebrows, eyes glued to the paper cup in Darcy’s hand. The brunette grinned as she passed it over to her friend. They’d discovered the joy of dark chocolate and chili powder in their coffee while they were in New Mexico. There was something about that extra zip with the caffeine that made everything seem so much better. 

“Harriet’s should be a national landmark, forever protected from corporate takeover and Starbucks infringement.” Darcy nodded, inhaling the spicy sweet scent coming from her steaming cup. 

“We could make them a plaque “New York’s Finest Brew”” Jane agreed, sipping lightly and letting her eyes roll back in pleasure. 

“I’m glad she made it through the attack.” Darcy mentioned a moment later, a faint frown on her face.

“Me too, if only for my own selfish needs,” Jane admitted a moment later, watching the younger woman carefully.

“Yeah,” Darcy was looking past Jane into nothing, disappearing into her own head as she’d been doing a lot lately. Phil had loved Harriet’s, he’d introduced Darcy to the wonder of the store roasted beans and the little shop that always smelled of slightly burnt coffee beans. Harriet herself was a sixty-five year old woman who ran the little shop with a smile and a steel fist. Darcy had offered to marry her about ten minutes after tasting the first cup the woman had made for her. When Darcy had introduced Jane to Harriet’s, Jane had asked Harriet to marry her. Apparently that was fairly normal for the older woman. Phil would be glad Harriet and the store had made it.

“Hey, don’t go away on me,” Jane laid a hand on Darcy’s arm, drawing her attention. The voice was soft and a touch sad and Darcy felt her eyes start to swim as she met Jane’s warm brown gaze.

“You’d think I’d feel different, you know? I mean, he’s dead. I don’t get how that could happen. He’s Phil. MY Phil. It doesn’t feel like he’s gone forever, it feels like he could walk through the door at any moment edging along the wall and getting ready to dodge whatever I have near at hand because I will be aiming it right for his head and for some reason it turns him on more than it makes him nervous.” The tears were streaming now and Darcy ruthlessly swiped that back of her hand under her eyes, dashing away the hot tears and taking a deep breath to pull herself under control.

“Oh sweetie,” Jane wrapped her arms around the younger girl and tugged her down, careful to keep their coffee’s from spilling over as they settled down on top of a convenient table, mussing up the ordered piles of paper.

“Man, this sucks,” Darcy clung to the other woman, pausing to take a sip of the spicy and bitter coffee concoction.

“At least we have the coffee.” Jane agreed, bumping her forehead gently against Darcy’s. 

“And we’re actually getting paid to work these days.” Darcy agreed, sniffing back the last of her tears and shared a smile with her best friend. Things would be alright, they had to be.

In another location, not as far from the Tower as others might think, a pair of clear blue eyes blinked slowly open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait guys, I moved and it's taken this long to get internet hooked up in my new place -.-


	4. The Lines Keep Getting Thinner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A normal morning for Steve and Darcy. Things are still a bit shaky but maybe getting more normal for the girl.

Half past five in the morning and now Darcy had a friend waiting for her in the kitchen. Steve was usually making breakfast when she wandered in. He didn’t sleep much these days. He had already done his morning run and was flipping an omelette in the pan. 

“Three minutes.” He told her, eyeing her carefully as she opened the freezer to grab her favorite coffee beans and pour them into the grinder. She started brewing the coffee and took a seat just in time for Steve to slide a plate in front of her. 

“What is this?” Darcy poked at the creation with her fork and Steve slid onto the stool beside her. There was no meat and the omelette didn’t look very yellow. 

“It is a Fruit Omelette using egg whites. Think of it as a healthier kind of pop tart.” He grinned at her scowl and dug into his own. The blueberries and blackberries and strawberries spilled out as Darcy cut into the creation with her fork. She sniffed carefully, ignoring the smirk on Steve’s face as she carefully took a bite, the sweetened cream cheese oozing off her fork. 

“Oh my god, this is amazing!” Darcy took another bite and Steve smiled brightly as he plowed through his own breakfast. She finished in record time and moved around the counter to pour two cups of coffee. Her own was basic black, unless a professional barista was steaming milk and adding ridiculous amounts of chocolate to the coffee, it was best to leave it as it was intended. The second cup two teaspoons of sugar carefully stirred in and was walked over to the shelf that held only a single picture of Phil Coulson. She set the hot coffee down in front of the picture and picked up a cold cup from the day before and headed back to the kitchen, dumping the old coffee and slurping down more of her own. 

“I’m not surprised that Phil had a dame like you waiting for him, seems like all the good soldiers did.” Steve commented, his voice soft and full of regret. Darcy turned her head to look at the tall blond, his attention on his empty plate, his face a mask of sorrow. The brunette had been told that Steve didn’t like to talk about the old days, about the friends he’d lost in the war. She’d heard about the ‘dame’ that Steve had left behind as well. 

“I’m what you pictured waiting home for Phil?” She quirked an amused eyebrow, the corners of her lips lifting a bit. Steve grinned, meeting her eyes for a moment.

“Maybe not _exactly_ what I pictured,” He allowed after a moment. Though the truth is that she would have been a lot closer to what he’d picture than the slender waifs that seemed to be the epitome of beauty these days. Women were supposed to have curves and smiling lips that held back secrets that drove a man crazy. Darcy had the smiling eyes and wicked grin that would have warmed the men on cold nights in the trenches back in his day. Darcy, from what he had heard, was a pistol. It didn’t surprise him in the least that Phil would have a woman of her caliber waiting for him.

“I’m like the Spanish Inquisition.” She gave a Gallic shrug and winked as she refilled her coffee cup. 

“Ah! Monty Python!” Steve raised a fist in the air and smiled, happy to get more pop culture references. Darcy gave him a nice golf clap and grinned when his cheeks went a bit pink.

“Don’t be embarrassed, it’s alright if you don’t understand everything you hear. I only understand about half the shit that flies through the lab.” Darcy shrugged once more and hopped up on the counter, settling back against the cupboards rather than taking a seat on the stool she’d been using.

“I actually have something for you.” Steve said after a few more moments. Darcy cocked an inquisitive eyebrow, looking at him curiously. Steve checked his pockets before pulling out a small package and sliding it across the counter. Darcy grabbed the small, butcher paper wrapped object and held it up in front of her, pulling the twine and carefully unwrapping the present. 

“I’ve just been carrying them around, I didn’t know what else to do with them.” Steve rubbed the base of his skull and frowned at the cards Darcy was fanning out in her hands. 

“What is all over them?” Darcy rubbed her thumb over the rusty stain on the corner of a card she had bought for Phil. It had been a collector’s item, hard to find and rarely in good condition let alone the mint condition Darcy had found at a garage sale of all places. 

“He had them on him when he died,” Steve continued. Darcy blinked, her body going tense as she rubbed at the blood stains. Why would Phil have been carrying those? He never carried the cards. When he was on site the cards were in his locker or in his room, he didn’t want to risk damaging them. Even when they were on him though, they should have been in their clear little cases. She had given him more grief over his care of feeding of trading cards than she had over anything else during the course of her relationship. 

“Fury said I could keep them since there was no next of kin.” Steve mentioned. Those words had Darcy’s dark blue eyes turning glacial and cleared the confused sadness from her face. 

“Fury.” She hopped off the counter and strode down the hall. Steve stayed in his chair, more than a little confused. He didn’t have long to wait until the angry Darcy was coming back toward him, her bag tossed across her shoulders, her hair an angry mess of curls, and a focused look on her face.

“Darcy, where are you going?” Steve asked, standing up and walking forward as a rumpled Jane entered the kitchen followed by a perfectly coiffed Pepper. 

“I’m gonna go give the one eyed pirate a peg leg.” Darcy sent the trio a bright smile and stomped down the hall. 

“We should probably call Natasha.” Jane piped up a moment later. Steve and Pepper both turned to stare at the petite scientist in vague confusion and she smiled as she poured herself a cup of coffee and grabbed a packet of pop tarts. “It’s nice to know Darcy is starting to feel better, but it’s probably best if she doesn’t get thrown in jail for going after Director Fury.” She explained. She gave them a wave and headed out to the elevators, her experiments were calling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phil will be coming soon!


	5. I Wont Always Be The One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SHIELD goes on alert, Darcy has it out with Fury, and we get to see Phil!

“Foster thinks she’s coming here?” Natasha asked, hooking her holster on over her hips. Her eyebrows twitched together in a vaguely quizzical manner as she left the women’s locker room. For someone that was usually blank faced unless she was on a mission, the quizzical gaze was cause for concern for many of the agents. 

“Code Orange, level 4. Code Orange, level 4.” An automated voice began announcing from the ceiling. Natasha’s face went blank once more as she started running to the stairwell.

“I’m going to have to call you back, Pepper.” She hung up, slipping the phone into her back pocket as she took the steps three at a time. Her fellow agents made room for her as she passed them by, it was always best to let the upper agents go first. They got angry when you blocked their shots. 

“Sitrep.” Natasha barked after exiting the stairwell. She was took an earpiece from a calm looking Sitwell and hooked it into her ear.

“Female person, 5’3”, 130lb, broke into the facility and locked herself in with Director Fury.” Sitwell informed her and the rest of the agents now fanning out behind her. Natasha pulled a gun from her left thigh and lifted it. 

“The security team?” Clint asked, joining them in the center of the group. His eyes were trained down the short hall to Fury’s office. 

“No injuries. They let her through.” Another agent added a moment later. Natasha and Clint both turned gimlet stares on the man. It was a good thing he didn’t visibly show how much the two agents intimidated him, they would have ripped him apart. 

“Subject has just been identified as a one Darcy Lewis.” Another agent called loudly, smiling with fierce pleasure that they had identified the person who had broken into their house and was locked in with their director. Sadly the three top agents at the head of the charge did not feel the same way as she did. Clint groaned and Natasha blinked, that blink was enough to alert her partner though. 

“What do you know?” He was serious as he leveled his blue eyes on hers and Natasha wanted to squirm just the tiniest bit. She didn’t, of course, because the Black Widow was above such reactions and no way in hell was she going to be anything less than the best in front of the other agents. Boys would start thinking they could take her in a fight again and she’d be suspended for breaking too many heads _again_.

“Pepper called, Darcy was upset about some collector’s cards that Rogers has been holding on to.” Natasha informed him carefully, eyes straying to the office and betraying her worry to the archer.

“Right.” Clint took a deep breath and walked down the hall to knock on the door. 

On the other side of the door Darcy was staring at Fury, rage seething in her eyes and the cards she’d gotten from Steve carefully lined up on his desk. She had come in, laid out the cards while ignoring Fury’s order to leave his office, and then stunned the man. He hadn’t been expecting that or Darcy probably would have been shot. At the very least he would have dodged. Still, she had the upper hand at this point and tazing the Director of a super-secret dictatorial government agency was actually kind of therapeutic. 

“You didn’t have to ruin these. You could have just painted his blood on the plastic covers to get whatever sick little manipulative game you were playing started.” She told him, her tone conversational. He was still twitching a bit, the muscles behind his eye patch making the dark piece of fabric jump. The radiating scars were jumping as well and she had a feeling that the sensation was less than pleasant. 

“I get that you think your end game is the most important thing on Earth, really I do, but I still can’t seem to bring myself to care about them.” She told him, her tone becoming heavier as she talked. His single eye attempted to skewer her as she continued to speak. “My world is a lot smaller. I have me and Jane and our work and I had Phil. Only Phil was taken away from me, from you as well, by a fascist alien asshole with daddy issues. I don’t hold that against you, Phil loved you. He believed in you and this agency, he believed in what he did and he loved it. He died saving a lot of other people. It happened and it hurts that he isn’t here and I hate that. I hate that happy things make me sad and that I washed his clothes so they don’t really smell like him anymore. Most of all though, I hate that you took his most prized possessions and half destroyed them to emphasize a point that had already been made.” 

Darcy brought up the tazer and shot it again. Tony had upgraded it last week and she was pretty sure it wasn’t street legal at this point. The electrodes hit one of the most powerful men in the world right in the center of the chest and he went rigid and began jerking once more. She’d need to tell Tony how well the thing worked. A knock on the door had Darcy taking a calming breath and then setting the tazer down on Fury’s desk before turning to open the door, her chin held high.

“You’ll probably need to get him to medical.” Darcy told Clint, breezing past him and down to Sitwell where she lifted both arms expectantly, wrists out. “Phil is probably disappointed.” She admitted, turning sad eyes to Natasha. 

“He is probably extremely disappointed in SHIELD Security Agents, never in you.” Sitwell told her, loosely hooking a pair of manacles over her wrists. “Down to holding with you, Ms. Lewis,” 

“I’ll call Pepper.” Natasha told her softly, slipping her gun back in its holster.

XXXX

“Do you know what day it is, Agent Coulson?” Doctor Corrigan asked, standing at the foot of the bed and staring steadily into Phil’s bright blue eyes.

“It depends on how long I’ve been out,” Phil responding, wincing as he moved to sit up and his chest pulled painfully. 

“You’ve only been out a few hours this time.” The doctor replied, a smile spreading across his mouth.

“Then it would be Tuesday.” Phil answered, leaning carefully into the carefully padded bed. Loki had skewered him and they didn’t want pressure on his front or back. He understood that much. He even understood that he had been out for over a month. He didn’t understand the lack of personnel, flowers, candy, and tacky little stuffed creatures that Darcy seemed to love. Nor was anyone in the mood to enlighten him to these. Every time he started questioning he was given a sedative. It was starting to make him angry, and while his rage was not as impressive as Doctor Banners, they would regret the high handed treatment once he had a bit more control over his body. He answered the rest of the Doctors inane questions before closing his eyes and feigning more weariness than he actually felt.

“Good, good.” Doctor Corrigan noted a few more things on his chart, gave him a warm smile, and then left the room to update the Director. Hopefully they would be given permission to move him, or at least to give him answers to the questions that he was asking. Phillip Coulson was still not in any kind of shape to handle stress well and they had needed to sedate him three times in the last two days when bp became erratic. Doctor Corrigan was of the opinion that if the lady Agent Coulson was most distressed over could visit, a great deal of his stress would actually be alleviated. Sadly, it wasn’t up to Corrigan and even a doctor had to obey orders when they didn’t risk a patients life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, last update for the weekend as it is Emerald City ComicCon and I am a Minion (staff)!


	6. Make It Like It Never Happened

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Aftermath of Tazing Fury

“I brought you a present.” Tony was holding a harmonica up, a smarmy grin on his face that had Darcy grinning back. He passed it through the small sliding window in the glass wall and Darcy unfolded herself from the surprisingly comfy cot to walk over and get it. Technically you were supposed to pass meals and drinks through the small window, but very few people actually said no to Tony Stark.

“I’ll have to work on channeling my inner blues,” Darcy told him, inspecting the instrument as she sat back down on the white cot while Tony leaned back against the far wall and watched her. He did that sometimes, just started until someone cracked like an egg. Darcy stared back rather than giving him the satisfaction of winning. Tony broke first. He could only handle so much silence.

“I am disappointed in you Lewis. You used my equipment to break through SHIELD security protocols and take down the Director.” Tony was frowning at her and Darcy frowned back, though she was more confused than anything else. She was pretty sure Tony was one of the few that wouldn’t find her actions incriminating. 

“I’m sorry?” She offered the words but it was only about half felt. She was sorry if he was upset, but not that she’d done it. 

“Don’t be sorry, just invite me along next time.” Tony pointed a stiff finger at her and Darcy blinked quickly as the genius shoved his hands in his pockets and hunched his shoulders. “How did you even get Jarvis to bypass all of that coding?” He demanded a moment later, an intrigued gleam in his eye.

“I said please.” Darcy shrugged. It was true. She’d said pretty please and Jarvis had said very well. He had very few arguments against her in the beginning anyhow. She was pretty sure it was because Tony’s programming was vaguely subversive and even good people like Jarvis got sucked into his mindset after a while. That and Jarvis was Tony’s brainchild and bound to have at least a few quirks that resembled his creator. 

“Please. Maybe that’s how Pepper does it.” The billionaire was looking toward the ceiling now, a thoughtful look on his face. He turned his attention back to the girl that was currently locked in the brig. She wasn’t watching him now, instead she was staring at the harmonica as she turned it over and over in her hands. She had dark bags under her eyes that hadn’t been there when she’d first moved in. She was distracted and maybe a little broken hearted. That had never actually happened to Tony, not since he’d been a small child anyway. He put up metaphorical armor to protect himself from emotional pain, he knew it wasn’t exactly healthy but it was the way it was. 

“It’s not like this is going on my permanent record, or like it would matter if it did. SHIELD pretty much owns us at this point. Maybe they don’t own you and Pepper so much, but me and Jane.” Darcy’s voice was flat and Tony felt his jaw clench in reaction to it. She was far too young to be so full of depressed resignation. 

“Hey.” He snapped, drawing big blue eyes to his very serious face. “If anyone owns your ass, it’s me. I pay for Jane’s research and her research assistant. Me.” He tapped a hard finger against the glass in his chest, it was hidden from the general public by shirts, but it was there. It was always there letting him know that he was only alive so long as he could use The Science to his advantage. A ghost of a smile flickered over the girls lips as she sighed and leaned back against the wall.

“Mine, mine, mine. You are so spoiled.” It was a truce of sorts, an acknowledgement that Tony had a point. It was all he was going to get but he was happy with it. A satisfied smirk pulled at his own mouth as he left the girl and walked out into the hall. SHIELD Lawyers were currently dealing with SI Lawyers and Pepper, who was not a woman you wanted to cross. Even if her degree _was_ in Art History.

XXX

“You haven’t healed enough, Phil. You need to give yourself more time before you push yourself like this.” Dr. Corrigan helped the agent back into bed, noting the cold sweat that had broken out on the other man’s forehead and the bleached pallor of his skin. 

“I will not be locked in this room the rest of my life. I am an Agent of SHIELD.” Phil wheezed as he collapsed back against his pillows. He’d been lifting the IV pole, noting that in his weakened condition it was as good as weights. He hadn’t anticipated only being able to lift it six times before he collapsed from exertion. It was a bit humiliating. 

“And as far as your fellow SHIELD Agents are concerned, you died on the Helicarrier.” Dr. Corrigan informed him, not unkindly, and watched as Phil seemed to shrink in on himself for a moment. It didn’t take long for a determined look to enter his eyes and his mouth to go thin. 

“The reports were obviously exaggerated.” He noted, deciding to dismiss the odd feelings of foreboding that were riding through his veins. The only one that could make a decision like that was Nick Fury, and if the Director had done so there must have been a reason. Perhaps even the reason that Phil himself had offered while he was thinking he was about to die. 

“Tomorrow we will start you on physical therapy.” Dr. Corrigan frowned at the satisfied look in Phil’s eyes. “You will do _only_ what the physical therapist gives you to do.” It was a useless order really, but one he had to give. Phil wasn’t going to push himself so far that he relapsed, there was no fear of that. The other man’s psyche eval was too sound. Didn’t mean he wasn’t going to push himself as hard as he could though. Past injury reports stated that he seemed to know the line between permanent harm and discomfort and stop just shy of it. He met Phil’s eyes and held them for a few very long moments. 

“There is a woman that I, very much, need to see.” Phil admitted. His eyes crinkled the tiniest bit at the corner, whether with pleasure or pain the doctor couldn’t be sure. It might even have been a bit of both. 

“We’ll get you started on the physical therapy tomorrow at 1100.” Corrigan agreed, nodding once before standing and leaving the room. Phil leaned back against his pillows and closed his eyes, and like every time he closed them, all he saw was Darcy’s wicked smile painted on his eyelids. Tonight he would dream of her laughter as she danced around the living room, singing into a wooden spoon while he laid on the couch and watched her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ECCC was AWESOME. I hugged Misha Collins.


	7. I've Given Up On Giving Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy gets a Get-Out-Of-Jail Party and Phil gets a physical therapist.

There was no longer any question in SHIELD’s Agents minds as to why the illustrious Phil Coulson had been interested in the seemingly normal Darcy Lewis: she had the lady-balls to taze Director Fury _in his own office_. On top of that the Avengers as a group seemed to be protective of the girl (not that she needed it, apparently.) Darcy Lewis, pseudo-vagabond, was now infamous.

She’d spent thirty eight hours in a SHIELD detainment cell before Fury was willing to let her out. She didn’t see him, didn’t talk to him, didn’t _want_ to talk to him; but apparently, one at a time, Steve, Tony, Natasha, and Clint had all made their way up to talk to the man and explain why she was better off out of custody. Darcy was pretty sure she was kept so long just because Fury wanted everyone to know it was his choice to let her out.

Tony was allowed to bring Darcy back to the Tower, Happy giving her a quick hug before opening the door to the car, and she was allowed a shower before her “Release Party” began. She shouldn’t have been surprised really, it was Tony after all. Not that she was all that involved. She sat on the seat closest to the little shrine to Phil and nursed a few glasses of wine. 

It wasn’t that she didn’t appreciate the thought, or the alcohol really, but there were more people than she felt like dealing with. Thankfully Clint and Natasha were happy to head off anyone who attempted to come her way. They understood she didn’t feel like dealing with people. Surrounded as she was, it was nice to sit alone with a glass of wine. The hum of the celebration was ignored, her eyes focused outside the windows at nothing in particular. 

******

Across the city Phil was walking to the bathroom on his own. The vicious look he was sending Nurse Pierce would hopefully ensure he was left alone for the entirety of his trip to the bathroom as well. He was definitely tired of people helping him use the toilet like some toddler with bladder control issues. He was a full grown man, damnit! A few minutes later the Agent was contemplating the various ways to kill someone in a hospital bathroom as the nurse knocked lightly on the door. It was his own fault for flushing before he realized he couldn’t get up. 

“Agent Coulson, if you make me get an orderly to unlock this door for me I will put you on bedrest for another three days.” The woman informed him after another minute of silence. Phil wanted to open the door and give her the bland look her was so (in)famous for, but he was pretty sure she’d just mock him for it. The woman was a menace. 

“Give me a moment,” Phil half growled his frustration. He was pretty sure the scrawny woman outside was unimpressed though. “Please.” The word might have been grudging, but it was still out there.

“Five minutes, no more.” Pierce responded a few moments later, her voice equally grudging. He wasn’t sure why that woman had been put in charge of his physical therapy. She had a poor bedside manner, little patience for a man’s dignity, and was constantly ignoring his wishes. A tiny part of his mind acknowledged she was the perfect person to be in charge of his therapy, being coddled and talked down to would have made him give up rather than pushing him forward. Didn’t mean he didn’t think Doctor Corrigan secretly hated him. In another life he was pretty sure she would have made a perfectly respectable German Dungeon Dominatrix, her safe word far too incomprehensible for anyone to ever actually say. It was just a theory though.

*******

Darcy was slowly coming out of her fog. She wasn’t the vibrant girl she had been, but she was a bit less lost. She had adopted most of the wayward scientists on her floor; collating, copying, researching, and often feeding the group without comment. As they needed help, she supplied it. It was not unlike the job she’d created when interning with Doctor Foster, though she was getting paid a lot more these days and no longer worried about telling people what to do and when to do it. She saw a need, she figured out the solution. That was what Darcy Lewis did these days.

Until she got home, and then she sat down in her room and wondered when the pain would ease. Or she’d go out to the main room and sit in the chair in front of Phil’s little shrine, feeling oddly closer to him that way. She’d pretend he was alive, that he was just missing and they would find him. It was a stupid day dream, but she was kind of a stupid little girl when it came to him. Why else would she be drifting around like a maudlin heroine from a Bronte novel? 

Phil, for his part, was coming to grudgingly enjoy verbally sparring with Nurse Pierce. He was also planning to recruit her as an assistant when he was let out so he could set her on Barton. He was fairly sure not even his odd affinity for ducts and air vents would save the archer from her looks for derision should he cross her. She was also handy with a syringe and had no qualm knocking someone on their ass should they refuse to do as she bid them. He knew from experience. 

Of course she was also good for orange sherbet and taped copies of Super Nanny when she felt he might need them. She was very, very good at her job. Of course, Dr. Corrigan was unlikely to leave him with anyone else. Three weeks in her care had done the agent a lot of good, he could now do light calisthenics twice a day with a long walk in between, all accompanied with Pierce’s quiet presence and often biting wit. She and Darcy would get on like a house fire. In fact the nurse had commented she liked the sound of Darcy quite a bit and wouldn’t mind meeting the woman who could keep a type-A micromanager like Phil in line. 

That was the major issue of course, though. Agent Coulson hadn’t lost his wits when he’d very nearly lost his life. He knew he was being kept under close surveillance, knew also he wasn’t going to be allowed to leave without a lot more trouble than he was actually up for. Not that he would be admitting it out loud. No need to give Nurse Pierce the satisfaction, even if she was growing on him. He turned his thoughts toward Darcy once more, her snapping blue eyes and wicked smile drawing out a small smile from him as he turned off the shower and dried off quickly so he could get dressed in the sweats he was now allowed to wear instead of the disturbingly drafty hospital gown. As he left the bathroom he spotted Nick Fury sitting on one of the visitor seats in his room and paused for a moment.

“Director.” He nodded his head and felt his face go Agent Blank as Darcy had termed it. The one eyed man before him raked him over cooly.

“Coulson.” He responded after a few long moments. They were both silent then, the two of them knowing how to game was supposed to be played but neither was sure if it would actually work that way this time. In the end they both concluded nothing had changed in their dynamic.

“What do you need me to do, sir?” Coulson knew his duty, knew that if the Director was coming to see him privately it meant he needed the best and he needed it kept quiet. Not that, at this particular moment, Phil could do much else. 

Fury’s brown eye was steady on Phil’s face, but there was a hint of sympathy in it as well. He understood what he was asking of the younger man, but he was going to ask it anyhow, because Phil would do it. “Here is everything you need to know about a man known as Winter Soldier.” Nick Fury passed a data pad over to Phil and settled back as the agent started to sift through the information. He let him read in silence for a few moments before continuing in a calm, soft voice. “I need you to stay dead, Agent Coulson.”


	8. And I Know This Isn't Enough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Movie Night in Avengers Tower!

“Why did Thor just call me Honey Boo Boo?” Jane demanded as she stomped into the kitchen, her dark glare flicking from one person to another as Darcy and Steve went through the steps of preparing dinner. 

“Why does Boromir do anything, really?” Tony asked, hand loosely waving as he poured Pepper a glass of red wine. The redhead gave him an unimpressed look as she took the glass from his hands. 

“It’s a term of affection?” Darcy offered, her face would have been more believably innocent if it weren’t for the wicked glint in her eyes. Jane hadn’t seen it in a while and she felt her heart thump a little harder with joy, but first she was going to have to rip into the younger girl a bit. 

“A term of affection he got from _whom_?” The petite scientist bit out.

“Who knows where these wacky kids get their idea’s,” Tony smiled and set another glass of red wine near Darcy. He didn’t want to stop her as she browned the beef, taco night was an important tradition, even if it was a fairly new one. 

“What did I say about teaching him culture through reality television!?” Jane demanded, her voice raising as she huffed her irritation.

"Technically you said we shouldn't teach _Steve_ pop culture via reality tv," Darcy noted with a shrug.

"Strictly on the basis that reality television has so little to do with _reality_!" Jane growled, her frustration obvious.

“So, a dollar doesn’t make you holler?” Pepper asked, her voice calmly inquisitive as Tony turned to stare at her in amused delight and Jane paused in her ranting. Darcy and Clint both burst into laughter a moment later, unable to help themselves. Even dressed down in one of Tony’s button up shirts and a pair of cut off shorts she exuded sleek sophistication, you simply didn’t expect things like that to come out of her mouth. Then again she _was_ engaged to Tony Stark.

“That show isn’t accurate of how things are in that area of the south, then?” Steve actually sounded rather relieved as he asked for confirmation and that set Darcy and Clint into a new round of laughter, the brunette girl allowing Natasha to come around and snag the spatula from her so that the meat wouldn’t be burned. 

“No, no it is not,” Jane told him with a sigh as Thor came down the hall, a confused look on his face as he ran a hand through his damp hair. 

“I do not understand what I have done to upset you, my love.” He told her, walking up behind the tiny woman and wrapping his arms around her midsection. She leaned her head back and quirked a grin up at him.

“It wasn’t you, it was Tony.” She assured the Asgardian.

“Wait now, how is that fair?” Tony demanded. Pushing back from the counter, an overly affronted look on his face that told everyone he wasn’t at all upset. He was simply enjoying being the center of attention. 

“Showing them Jersey Shore was your idea, I know for a fact Darcy hates that show.” Jane retorted.

“But Real Housewives of Atlanta was Darcy’s idea.” Bruce popped in, deciding to side with his Science(!) Bro on this one. 

“Besides, Toddlers in Tiara’s was totally my idea.” Clint informed Jane with a grin which had Darcy snickering once more. 

“Food’s done, everybody grab a plate!” Natasha declared, pulling the warmed tortillas out of the oven. The group converged, people passing bowls of various toppings left, right, and behind in a chaotic sort of dance until everyone’s plates were full and they were heading toward the couches where they were going to have movie night. Tonight was a Pepper choice and, in deference to Steve’s moral standing, they were watching A League Of Their Own. 

“No crying in baseball, but at my school I made all those softball bitches cry,” Darcy announced smugly before pulling out a quarter from her pocket and tossing it to Clint. He could toss the quarter from anywhere in the room and it would land in the ugly vase Pepper had deemed appropriate for the job. The swear jar had been Bruce’s idea and every time it was filled, the vase was dumped out at various charities around the city.

“He does kind of look like a penis with a little hat on,” Tony added a moment later, his tone contemplative. Pepper drove a bony elbow into his stomach, making him grunt in pain, but there was a smile on her lips.

“Can you dance like that Steve?” Darcy asked curiously, causing most of the room to glance toward the tall blond. All the attention made red creep up his neck and Darcy smiled wickedly. 

“I, uh, no. No, I don’t.” Steve told them, clearing his throat. Bucky could do that kind of thing, he wanted to tell them all about his best friend, a man whose face haunted the pages of his sketch book, but it was still too painful to think about. It might have technically happened more than 70 years before, but to Steve his best friend had died on his watch not more than a few months ago. It was a lot to deal with.

“Too bad, it looks like fun,” Darcy shrugged and snuggled back down against Jane, her feet tucked under Clint’s thigh to keep her toes warm. 

“I had the biggest crush on Geena Davis,” Bruce admitted as the movie came to a close and the credits began to roll. 

“Who didn’t? Those legs!” Tony slapped a hand over the arc reactor in an overly dramatic gesture of heartache. 

“Is that what it is?” Pepper arched a knowing brow, her lips quirked into the tiniest of smiles as she slowly stretched out her own long limbs and slowly rested her bare feet on the coffee table. Tony’s eyes traced from her hip to her toes and she grinned again, passing him her empty plate. “Be a dear?” 

Tony sighed gustily and took her plate, stacking it on top of his own and then taking Natasha’s, Darcy’s, and Jane’s. He left the boys to do their own as he wandered into the kitchen scraped food down the disposal in the sink (which, after some tinkering, could devour bone without a hiccup - it had concerned Darcy a little bit) and then loaded them into the dishwasher.

“Who knew Stark could do dishes,” Clint commented, bringing his own dirty dishes into the kitchen as Tony made his way back to the ladies with another bottle of wine. 

“Only until he can figure out how to make Rosey the Robot Maid,” Darcy shot back, lazily lifting her arm for a refill.

“I’ve already done better than that, just ask JARVIS,” Tony shot back, a smug grin on his face.

“You’d really rather not hear my opinions on that matter,” The AI commented, his voice dry and just a touch weary. Tony shot a glare at the ceiling and then gave up with a sigh as Darcy and Pepper both patted him consolingly on the arm at the same time. 

“You know, this gives me an idea,” he informed the two of them as he leaned back into their comforting touches. Pepper pulled her hand back, giving him an unamused glance. Darcy merely whacked him on the back of the head and moved back to Jane. 

“You could not handle two such valiant beauties,” Thor informed Tony, a wicked gleam in his eye.

“Oh man, is this going to be another round of “the hammer is my penis” because if it is I’m not gonna be able to look at Mew Mew the same for a week.” Darcy groaned, playful disgust in her voice. Jane kicked a foot out, knocking her friend a bit as she giggled.

“Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog! Que it up JARVIS!” Tony announced gleefully, settling down on the floor in front of Pepper, pulling one of her legs over his shoulder and absently rubbing the soles. She hummed happily as Bruce began cleaning up the rest of the kitchen in the background and Clint settled back into his spot, shooting Darcy an amused glance as she shoved her toes back under his thigh. 

Steve, for his part, was now sketching the group. He liked movie nights, they tended to be impromptu due to surprise scheduling graces. It was really the only time everyone was able to relax in the same room. Almost the same room. Bruce liked to keep to the fringes, afraid to get too close to anyone. Even now he was back in the kitchen rather than piled around the rest of the group. He avoided the casual touch and kept himself in a self imposed segregation. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust others, he simply didn’t trust himself. He was more open with Tony than anyone else, bonding with the quicksilver genius in a way which didn’t make much sense to Steve.

Natasha wasn’t much better. Even when she was there, she wasn’t. Not entirely. She was tucked into the corner of the sofa Clint beside her, but not quite close enough to touch. She seemed very ambivalent about the team, liking that they worked well together, but not liking that she had to give some measure of trust to so many people. She sat with them, a faint smile playing around her lips, but she didn’t like to show her emotions. She kept them tucked away where no one could see them or use them against them. He didn’t think he wanted to know what could make a woman so defensive.

Then there was Clint, seemingly happy all the time. A trickster at heart, a man who could hit anything he aimed at. Clint, the assassin who loved to laugh and smile, even when those smiles didn’t reach his eyes. He was loyal to a fault when it came to Natasha, rumor had it that this went all the way back to the day he met her. He fit himself into any dynamic, having no problem tweaking his actions and words to fit in. It was why he was such an exemplary spy. 

Blue eyes flitted to Pepper Potts and Tony Stark. The man used his abrasive personality as a weapon, fighting with words and emotions before settling on weapons. His intellect was formidable, his tongue razor sharp, but he was soft with Pepper. The graceful CEO of Stark Industries who epitomized velvet glove over a steel fist. She looked like a strong wind could knock her down, but really she was stronger than possibly anyone else in the room. She protected Tony, fiercely at times, but she also gave as good as she got. Tony was a man used to people leaving him, using him, and dismissing him without a second though. He fought for every ounce of attention he could get and then half destroyed himself, because he knew attention didn’t bring affection. Except, with Pepper. With the elegant Ms. Potts he relaxed, he allowed himself to be calm. The two were tangled together whenever they were near one another; leaning toward each other, against each other, smiling wickedly at one another. Two halves of the same coin, he couldn’t think of one without thinking of the other.

Then there was Jane. The petite scientist had ripped open the heavens just the week before to get to the man she loved. A whom she had fallen in love with in a matter of days. She had changed the laws of physics as the world knew them and couldn’t even tell anyone about it. Yet she was happy, contently tucked into the side of the blond Asgardian who very obviously adored her. Thor, who was sometimes looked on as oafish in his home, who had learned a very hard lesson in humility, but came out stronger in the end. He was smarter than he sometimes seemed, obviously spoiled, and cared greatly for those he named friend.

Which brought him to Darcy. The curvy young woman with the red, red lips and the haunted eyes. Even when she smiled, there was sadness in her eyes. Sometimes rage as well. She was lonely, even now sprawled between Jane and Clint, obviously at home amidst the the group, her eyes were sad and not focused on the movie. She was thinking of a man she had loved and lost. It made him wonder, briefly, if he would ever be loved like that. Part of him wished yes, and part of him wished no. Watching Darcy, her pain evident every morning as she poured a cup of coffee for a man who couldn’t drink it, Steve knew he didn’t want to ever put someone through such pain.

Steve sighed softly, ignoring as Tony, Darcy, and Clint sang along to the film, and looked down at the sketchbook. He had drawn the group, yes, but Bucky’s face haunted the margins. He’d drawn his best friend without meaning to. It wasn’t the first time, wouldn’t be the last. He knew the pain Darcy knew in a way. She had lost the man she loved just a few short months ago, and Steve had lost his best friend not long before that. At least, not long for Steve. Seventy years may have passed for the rest of the world, but for him it was mere moments. 

The tall blond carefully tore the paper out of the sketchbook and folded it in half, tucking it into a pocket. He didn’t like to keep the pictures of Bucky’s shocked face as he fell from that train. It was bad enough that was all he saw when he did manage to fall asleep.


	9. Another Heartache, Another Failed Romance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy's first love.

“I don’t need a babysitter.” Phil informed Elizabeth Pierce, his gaze forbidding. For her part the nurse looked unimpressed.

“I am over qualified to be a babysitter. I have, however, been re-assigned to Facility NY-309 to work on Project Winter Soldier.” She informed him tartly, having become more comfortable in the two months since she’d been working with the man. He’d come a long way from the man who could barely making it the five steps to his bathroom. He was running a mile a morning now, though it was apparently still at a slower pace than he had once been able to do. She understood his frustration, but she also understood that the frustrations was part of his motivation, Phil was a bit of a masochist like that.

“And it has nothing to do with me, despite my new duties overseeing said project.” Phil commented, his voice almost bland. She smiled, it wasn’t an inviting smile either.

“It means you can’t miss our appointments without my knowing the reasons why. I suppose that makes it a bit to do with you.” She allowed. Her lips were thin and she wore chapstick, she didn’t wear much makeup at all really. He was glad for it since that made the ache in his chest that had everything to do with Darcy less noticeable. Elizabeth tossed on mascara so her blond eyelashes would stand out around her pale blue eyes, she used chapstick like it was an addiction, and her smiles were never wicked. He missed those red, wicked smiles. 

\----

The team was gone, having saved the world (yet again) and still on their way back from wherever. She had at least two hours before they got back. Jane was locked in the labs like a good little Mad Scientist and Pepper was in France for some kind of merger meeting. Darcy had time, now, to do something she’d been thinking about for a couple weeks now. 

The case was tucked all the way in the back of her closet, behind a couple empty suitcases. Her first love, the one that usually helped her get over all of her heartaches. The first time she admitted to Phil she had, in fact, been in love once before. Was still _in_ love, as a matter of fact, Phil had been a bit taken aback. When she had introduced him to Armande, he had seemed a bit less put out and a bit more amused. She had been wearing one of his oversized shirts and a simple pair of panties, nothing else, with Armande nestled gently between her thighs with her fingers on the cello’s neck. She had played a bit of Saint-Saens for him, her eyes closed and a soft smile on her lips as she lost herself in the music. 

Phil had very gently placed Armande back in his case, setting the bow on top of it, and then he had knelt before her, leaning forward and resting his forehead against her neck. She would never forget the feel of his hands on her waist, and his voice sounding just a bit breathless as he asked her to play him like her cello. 

Darcy felt tears begin to fill her eyes as she walked out to her little shrine, a simple chair set up in front of it now. She set her package down and opened the case, staring down at the polished wood. She pulled him out gently, still in love with the instrument. Armande brought her pain now, but it was a good kind of a pain. The kind of pain which made memories linger. She pulled out the bow first, going slowly through all the steps she had learned so long ago, before she pulled Armande up, settling him between her thighs. A few moments to tune and then she smiled up at the picture of Phil, wishing once more that it felt like he was dead. She needed him to come through the door, to find her sitting there in one of his sloppy FBI shirts and a pair of yoga shorts. He loved her sloppy and lounging with Armande. 

She pulled the bow slowly, closing her eyes as the first tears fell with that long, low note. She had never been overly fond of up beat ballads, the minor chords had always seemed so much more interesting to her ear. Now she wondered if she had always just been practicing for this moment, this time when she would need to focus everything she had into not breaking apart. Years of practice had made it second nature to make sure she held her elbows properly and kept her spine straight, she didn’t need to play sloppy for Phil. 

“Honey, we’re home!” Tony announced as he exited the elevator. Then he paused and looked around, whipping his sunglasses off as his eyes darted back and forth for a moment. “JARVIS, what floor are we on?” 

“I’m sorry Mr. Stark, Darcy expected you back later this afternoon and I don’t believe she would like to be disturbed.” The voice told him after a moments pause. 

“Is she doing something dirty,” the man waggled his eyebrows as he turned and walked down the familiar hall towards his labs. He’d flown ahead of the team so Darcy wouldn’t be alone too long. She tended toward hermitude when left alone for more than a few hours without people to bully into submission. Not, of course, that he was willing to admit as much to anyone. 

“I believe she is talking to Agent Coulson.” The AI replied after another short pause. Tony frowned and walked a bit faster, the doors to his lab sliding open as he walked and then sliding shut behind him. He tossed his jacket into one of the rolling chairs, sending it sliding away as he walked into the center of the lab.

“JARVIS, screens.” The thin, transparent screens lowered from the ceiling as Tony waited, his face closed off as he stared at the blank screen for a moment. “Where is Darcy.”

“The Shrine, sir.” JARVIS responded immediately.

“Give me the feed.” The words were soft, but firm. The image of the girl appeared, her back to him as sound filled the room. Haunting notes which seemed familiar, but he didn’t listen to a lot of Classical music given a choice so he didn’t know the composer. Her hair was loose behind her back, moving softly as she tilted her head with the music. Tony watched as the song drew to a close and she started a new one. Reaching out a hand he dragged a finger across the screen, spinning his viewpoint until he could see her face, her eyes closed despite the tears which leaked slowly out of them. Tony took a step forward, crossing his arms and bringing one hand up to cover his mouth as his dark eyes traced over her pained face. 

Tony didn’t say anything, just watched for a few minutes before he shut the image down, but left the music playing on the speakers. He started tinkering not long after that, working on small projects he didn’t always have time for. When the music stopped and was replaced with sobs he simply turned off the sound from the feed and turned up Def Leppard. He had his own ways of working out rage and grief, he understood when a person needed to relapse for a few minutes so they could get through the next month. Darcy, at least, wasn’t self destructive about it. 

“What are you doing back so early?” Jane was suddenly in his doorway and Tony cocked an eyebrow, glancing down at the device in his hands. 

“I realize it’s a private jet and all, but really, why bother when you can fly yourself?” Tony shrugged and continued with the soldering iron, not looking at the tiny woman who was moving forward and looking at him with narrowed eyes. 

“Tony Stark doesn’t do things without ulterior motive.” Jane informed him a moment later, her eyes glancing down at the item in his hands. “Are you turning a lipstick tube into a taser?” 

“Yes I am.” There wasn’t any point in denying it, so he didn’t. Besides, it was kind of a work of genius (his specialty) so it was nice to have people notice it. There were a few moments longer of Dr. Foster staring at him without a word and Tony cleared his throat and focused on the task at hand. He was not letting her try and make him embarrassed. 

“You are so whipped.” Jane announced a moment later, grinning a bit as she crossed her own arms and didn’t leave.

“Says the woman who can’t keep her hands out of Galadriel’s pants.” Tony retorted, turning off the soldering iron and setting it off to the side.

“Having had my hands down said pants more than once in the last twenty-four hours I can assure that Galadriel is lacking all the equipment I’ve quickly grown fond of.” Jane shot back, still grinning. 

“I do supply a great lab, don’t I?” Tony grinned back. They stood staring at each other for a moment before Jane shook her head and laughed. Tony was much better at these games than she would ever be. 

“You really do.” She agreed. She watched him work, not his face like Pepper did, but his hands. They moved quickly and with assurance, you could tell a lot about an engineer from their hands and what Jane found was strength, callouses, and dexterity with more care than she’d ever thought she’d find in that quarter. 

“Foster, get out of my lab. Go break a star or something..” Tony announced, lifting a hand and shooing her out. She frowned at him and suddenly remembered the poptarts she had been in search of before she’d heard the music coming from his labs. Then she remembered the experiment and glanced at her blank wrist. Food and Tony were forgotten in moments as she realized the testing should be done and her results would be waiting for her back in her own labs.


	10. Something About You Is Something I Need

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An interlude of the Phil variety

He’d gotten a glimpse of her and broken his cool a bit. He’d been called to the Helicarrier and brought through suspiciously clear corridors to meet with Director Fury. He had no illusions about Maria and his other three escorts; They were there to keep him quiet. He knew the rules of course, Phil had been following them for years. He’d never had a problem following them until waking up in that bed. He’d glanced down a corridor and seen her walking into a room, her dark curls bouncing as she nodded her head to whatever music she was listening to. He’d turned before he even thought about it. Taking half a step forward before a man was in front of him, an arm braced against Phil’s chest. For a long moment Phil had been ready to break that arm and turn down the hallway he was apparently forbidden from going down.

“Agent.” Deputy Director Hill’s voice drew his gaze. Her face was as stone cold as it usually was, her eyes though ... there was a compassionate look to them which wasn’t usually visible. She’d risen through the ranks of SHIELD fighting twice as hard as every man to make sure they knew she’d earned it. There was no skirting the rules and there was no twisting the words of the law for Maria, no. She was a believer in the good their agency could do. She was a good foil for Fury, questioning motives which weren’t all there and making her views known when she was against them. She was an excellent soldier, but apparently she was still human.

He had given his life to the service of his government and he had never before regretted it. Never before questioned it. That smile, that husky laugh, they were haunting his dreams and leaving an aching void in his chest. He hadn’t realized, before, he had been missing an integral piece of his soul. Darcy was that missing piece. He was an Agent of SHIELD. He knew his duty to his agency and he knew he had signed away most of his rights upon signing. He just needed to remember sometimes his duty to the government came before his wants and needs. They came before his craving for a wicked smile and biting wit. It was odd trying to sort his devotion to the work he’d bled for and his need for a woman who was quite possibly too young for him.

Phil took a half step back, his hands folded neatly in front of him. Apparently these men knew enough about Agent Coulson to still be on high alert. He wanted to smirk, just a bit, and set these men off. Make them a touch more paranoid. Make them jumpy enough someone would notice and it wouldn’t really be his fault that suddenly people would know he was alive. Darcy was _here,_ she was here when he was here. A single word and she would search him out. She had to feel the way he did and she wouldn’t let a rumor like that go. Never in a million years would _his_ Darcy not investigate that rumor. Those thoughts were obviously a sign of her influence.

They continued down more corridors, none of the knowing red lights were glowing from beneath the cameras located down each hallway. He was apparently top secret. He didn’t attempt to lurch down any more cross sections, but the men behind and to his side were still twitching. Maria didn’t make a single move. She knew he’d follow her. She paused outside an unmarked door for a moment before placing her hand on a box to the right of the door. It slid open and she stepped aside, not bothering to motion Phil inside of the room. He entered anyway. She followed and shut the door behind her.

Nick Fury was standing, hands behind his back, at a window observing the clouds which surrounded them. He didn’t turn as Phil and Maria entered so they both stood in relaxed positions to wait patiently for the Director to decide he had waited long enough to prove his dominance. They didn’t have to wait long. As the bald man turned around he sighed a bit, his face drawn into lines of fatigue. A year before and Phil would have been blandly smiling and taking on twice the work he usually did in order to help the other man out. Now he didn’t care quite so much.

“Thank you for coming.” Fury offered a moment later, taking a seat and motioning for them to do the same. Coulson took the seat and stayed silent. He wasn’t going to use false platitudes in order to be polite. Fury owed him so much more. Especially since there was very little reason why Darcy would be on the helicarrier. As that thought came to him Phil realized there was especially no reason for her to be there if Phil was going to be there as well and he hadn’t needed guards at all. Not unless they had thought he would make a break for it and there was no reason for him to attempt to leave the clearly empty path he was to take.

“Did I pass your test?” He asked after a few more minutes of silence. The look on Fury’s face didn’t change as he stared at his (arguably) best agent.

“Not with flying colors.” Fury informed him. Maria cleared her throat and Phil didn’t bother glancing over at her. He knew the woman well enough to know she was glaring at the director rather balefully at the moment. He could interrupt the noises she made. The woman could give speeches without once opening her mouth.

“I was told you wanted to discuss the progress with the subject formerly known as James Buchanan. If not I should get back to the project headquarters.” Phil responded evenly, his face blank as he shoved down feelings of anger. What would have happened to Darcy if he had broken away? What would they have done to her? Why did the Director feel it was necessary to test him like this? The danger level was high, too high for cautious Nick, but that meant the business with Winter Soldier was far more dangerous than he’d thought. There was a strong stench of politics to the whole business and Phil didn’t exactly love it.

“Read me his progress.” Nick made a gesture with his hand and settled in. The man had always preferred reports in person before reading the actual paperwork which had to be done. Phil began to speak, but a tiny part of his mind was focused on the fact that Darcy was so close and he couldn’t go to her without losing everything he’d devoted his last twenty years of life to.


	11. These Tricks That I'll Attempt Will Blow Your Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tony has a Sex Wiki and Rule 34 is explored.

“Everyone stationed on the frickin’ helicarrier is a douchenozzle!” Darcy snarled as she stomped into the Tower. She would have slammed a few doors as well, but Tony didn’t really like doors and kicking a wall to get her point across was kind of like kicking JARVIS. 

“Douchenozzle. I’ll have to remember that.” Tony noted, sipping his breakfast smoothie calmly and looking at something on his Stark-pad.

“Were they unkind to you, Lady Darcy?” Thor demanded, his face showing his displeasure at the thought. Jane had explained to him about Darcy and Phil Coulson, a man Thor had respect for. Darcy was his friend, his little lightning sister, and she had lost a good man in Phil Coulson. Mourning, for the Aesir, was done with parties for the fellow warrior. For the soul mate though, the true match of mind, body, and heart, that mourning period could last the rest of their life. As such he had made it his duty to protect the girl as much as she was willing to let him. He’d had to get a lesson on feminism first, though. 

“They were dicks of the highest caliber and their reasoning for having me up there was specious at best. Why the hell do I need to hand deliver reports? That’s what Natasha and Clint are for!” Darcy railed, stomping over to get a cup of coffee.

“Have I been relegated to courier?” Clint asked Natasha. The redhead shrugged and went back to the reading Vogue. The assassin loved fashion magazines.

“The only decent thing about the freaking trip was Maria.” Darcy grumbled. This got a raised eyebrow from Tony, his head shooting straight up.

“Maria Hill? Deputy Director?” He asked for clarification. He couldn’t quite make sense of the idea of strict, no-nonsense Hill and Darcy. Natasha didn’t look up as she flipped pages in the book, but she muttered something in Russian. Darcy was pretty sure was not polite. She’d have to make note of it for later.

“I like watching her stare at Nicky’s minions until they pee their pants.” Darcy shrugged. Tony blinked, that visualization making a lot more sense than the one he had of them braiding one another’s hair. Which brought him to the next order of business, though.

“Nicky?” He was staring at her expectantly. She shrugged again.

“He hates it.” She’d made sure to _only_ call him that the entire time she’d been up there. It was bad enough she had two babysitters the entire time. Not counting when Maria had decided she’d have coffee with Darcy (and slip her a flask of tequila, which was going to be their little secret for now.)

“Not surprising.” Clint offered dryly. He was apparently reading War and Peace in it’s original Russian at the moment. Tolstoy was Clint’s idea of light reading. She’d gotten used to seeing him with insane books most people wouldn’t read unless being forced to for college credit. She had a feeling, from the way other agents spoke to him, most people didn’t realize how incredibly intelligent the quiet man was. Didn’t change the fact he had a sophomoric sense of humor, though. 

“I heard about the staple gun incident in Prague.” Darcy offered a moment later, a smile spreading across her face. She liked hearing stories about Phil and his crazy ninja ways. 

“It’s a classic.” Natasha agreed, smiling a bit.

“What is it that has you so distracted, friend Tony.” Thor asked a moment later. Darcy turned to stare inquisitively at the billionaire as he continued to focus on the tablet. She frowned, realizing he was mostly ignoring her and her ire and had been since she walked in. Now he was also ignoring Thor. She frowned and walked over, snatching the electronic device from his hand. She dodged as he tried to take it back and darted to Natasha’s side. The redhead looked up from her magazine to skewer Tony with her gaze. Sister solidarity.

“I’m not sure if I’m impressed or horrified you have your own sex wiki.” Darcy told him a moment later, her face screwed up in an expression of amused resignation. His conquests apparently liked to keep tabs on his likes and dislikes. There were very few dislikes. 

“I made myself a moderator.” He informed her with a shrug.

“Did you create the page yourself?” Darcy shot back, eyeballing him as she held the tablet up a bit higher so Natasha could read it easier. The older woman was thoroughly amused by the information she was seeing. 

“Position 37. You’re more flexible than I would have thought.” She noted a moment later. 

“I don’t ..... actually I do want to know.” Clint set down Tolstoy and hopped off his stool to come over as well. 

“What is a sex wiki?” Thor asked a moment later. 

“Do you remember Wikipedia?” Darcy asked the tall blond as Clint made subtle gestures she was fairly sure meant she was supposed to stop talking. 

“The site on the internets of which anyone can add information and you must never trust it to be true unless you have verified the facts.” Thor recited, looking at Darcy expectantly. For all he sometimes came off as an oaf the man had some smarts under the golden locks. 

“That’s the one.” Darcy nodded. “A sex wiki is a wikipedia page where people have put up sexual exploits of certain individuals and often what people wish they could do with said individuals. Such as the manwhore himself.” Darcy fluttered her fingers in Tony’s direction. 

“Do you require money for services rendered, friend Tony?” Thor was grinning delightedly, raking an eye over the man in question. Tony sneered back at the man considered by some to be a god.

“Like anyone here could afford me,” He scoffed. 

“You’d let me borrow the money if I needed it.” Darcy told him, sure of this fact. “Or Pepper would.” 

“You’re probably right.” Tony decided after a moments pause. 

“Even if she knew what the money was for?” Clint asked, trying to figure this one out. Sometimes Darcy and Tony were incredibly odd brain-twins and it was hard to follow their route of twisted logic.

“Ultimately the money is Tony’s, even if she gives it to me. Therefor Tony gave me money so I could pay him to sleep with me, so really he was paying to sleep with me. I could tell everyone Tony Stark offered me a million dollars to sleep with him and I still turned him down.” Darcy shrugged. 

“хорошая девочка,” Natasha might have been smiling at Darcy or she might have still been amused by what she was reading on the website. She might never know, except she was pretty sure Natasha had at least been talking to her. 

“That’s a little bit twisted.” Clint added a moment later, sending a wry look at his partner. Natasha ignored him.

“You are all just jealous you don’t have a sex-wiki.” Tony announced a moment later, deciding things were getting vaguely uncomfortable and no one was paying enough attention to him. Darcy cocked an eyebrow and raked an eye over him.

“How is you haven’t died from a million STD’s yet?” Darcy demanded. 

“A highly paid team of infectious disease specialists. Also, they are called STI’s now.” Tony shot back, standing up and taking his tablet from the brunette. Natasha cocked an unimpressed eyebrow and he mimicked the movement, mocking her. Natasha might sometimes scare the billionaire, but he was pretty sure (most days) she wouldn’t kill him. She was much too fond of Pepper to upset her. 

“I wonder if there’s a Hulk Sex-wiki,” Darcy wondered out loud. She and Tony were both silent for a moment, Darcy’s head tilted a touch and Tony’s eyes looking upward and his body completely still. It was how you knew the two were locked in thought. They snapped out at the same moment and locked eyes.

“RULE THIRTY-FOUR!” They both shouted at the same time, equally manic looks of glee on their faces as Tony started tapping at his tablet and Darcy half draped herself over him so she could see. Thor turned to Clint, a look of consternation on his face. The bowman turned to Natasha.

“This one’s all yours.” He informed her before picking up his book and leaving the kitchen. There were some things a guy just didn’t need to see.


	12. Cold Wind Is Blowing Through My Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The 6 Month Anniversary of the battle of New York.

She was on the balcony, her arms wrapped around a pillow as she stared out of the city with a blank face. Six months. It had been six whole months since aliens had attacked New York City, attempting to rip a hole in the sky and destroy their entire world. Below her people were celebrating the triumph of their heroes in the streets. Somewhere downstairs there were people drinking and schmoozing and attempting to ingratiate themselves with her team. Darcy didn’t want to be part of it.

Instead she was upstairs in the private area, dressed in flannel pajama pants and an old army shirt which had mysteriously disappeared from Phil’s dresser once when he was visiting. If by “mysteriously” one meant “Darcy took it and don’t read into it Ninja-man, it’s not a thing”. Or at least that’s how she’d explained it once upon a time. Now she didn’t explain it. Instead she put it on, imagined Phil was going to slip under the covers at some point and wrap an around around her stomach and pull her in close. He was always the outer spoon.

She’d spent hours now trying to untangle all her feelings and give them labels. She needed to understand this inability to get over a man she hadn’t even realized she’d been so desperately in love with. How had she not realized all those feelings jumbled up inside her when he was there were just proof he was her foreverandalways? Now she was stuck with other feelings. Feelings of abandonment and hurt and rage. She hadn’t gone through the five stages of grief like she was apparently supposed to and it had taken her six months to figure out why.

He didn’t feel dead.

She woke up and it still felt like he might come to her door holding a single daisy and not offering a single excuse. Of course this time she would require an excuse of rather epic proportions. Because seriously, what the hell man! Darcy desperately wanted him to come up that elevator, to sit down on the couch and close his eyes with a weary sigh. She wanted to ignore him for a good twenty minutes while he decompressed and then sprawl across his lap and demand petting like an obnoxious housecat.

He was dead. She _knew_ that. She just didn’t _feel_ it. Phil was hers and she was his and there might never be anyone else. So obviously Phil needed to be there. With her. In the tower. She needed the bland smile he turned on everyone else to warm up to a wicked grin which made him look like a naughty little boy. She was pissed off he wasn’t there to keep Tony in line. Not that Darcy wanted him in line or anything, she just .... she didn’t know what. Not really.

“It’s cold out here.” Natasha’s voice didn’t even make Darcy jump, she simply expected people to randomly show up when she was supposed to be alone. It had taken a while, she’d jumped a lot when Phil first started showing up at her place. Then she’d come to realize it just meant she would never really be alone. Even though Phil wasn’t there, Natasha and Clint made up for it in some ways.

“It’s quiet.” Darcy responded, her voice soft and her eyes still out on the skyline. You couldn’t see any stars in New York City, it made her sad sometimes.

“What has you so deep in thought?” Natasha asked, a bottle of champagne held loosely in the assassin’s fist . She lifted it and took a gulp, leaning back against the railing so she was facing away from the city. She was disgusted by it today. You did not celebrate death and destruction, you marked it as a day in which you won and you moved on. Mourning and celebration were private and she did not appreciate having people attempting to force their brevity on her.

“I don’t think Phil is dead.” Darcy informed her a moment later. Blue eyes flew to the younger girl and she had a hand on the knife in her thigh sheath in an instant. She forced herself to relax a moment later.

“Explain.” She demanded, drinking more of the champagne. Darcy had a shrine of sorts, very Eastern Religions of her, but not something someone would create if they thought their loved one was really alive.

“Have you ever felt something so deep, had it so ingrained it just felt like a part of you? Just knew it was there, somewhere out there, because if it wasn’t you’d be missing an arm or a leg or something?” Darcy asked after a moment of silence. There were a few more long silent moments, but Darcy didn’t continue and the silence wasn’t actually uncomfortable.

“Yes.” Natasha admitted tilting the champagne bottle and pouring the bubbling liquid down her throat. She was drunk, not that most would notice, and being drunk made her sappy and gave her a propensity to overshare. Darcy didn’t seem surprised, she just nodded like she’d expected as much from the red haired assassin.

“Why don’t I feel like part of me is gone? If Phil was dead, wouldn’t I know? Wouldn’t I feel it? How can he be dead if I feel like he’ll be crawling into bed and whispering words like classified and redacted when I ask him where the hell he’s been?” She asked. Her voice was calm, but a touch hollow. Apparently she’d been up here for quite some time contemplating all of this and trying to come to terms with things.

“Your need keeps it alive.” Natasha explained after a few more long minutes of silence. She finished off the champagne and contemplated the bottle for a few more long moments.

“But it doesn’t keep _him_ alive,.” Darcy pointed out a moment later, raw anguish in her voice as she closed her eyes and huddled in on herself some more. Natasha didn’t look at her, letting the silence drag on instead. She didn’t know what she would have said anyhow. She hadn’t believed Yuri was dead either. She’d refused to admit anything of the sort, and then, when they had finally started to make her believe, she’d defected and spent the next decade killing anyone she could find who’d had a part in Red Room. It was her way of grieving.

But the rumors of Winter Soldier hadn’t died for long, they’d brought him back. He hadn’t been dead, just asleep like every other time. They had used the love Natasha wasn’t supposed to be able to feel against her, and she had been weak enough to let almost destroy her. She’d later been strong enough to almost destroy them. There was a symmetry to it she approved of.

She hadn’t believed Yuri was dead for a long time. She hadn’t _felt_ it like she had known she should have. Then, upon discovering his death was not as finite as she’d been led to believe, she had felt a bit vindicated. It had simply proved emotions had a strength to them certain individuals could not understand. It was not quantifiable, it did not have a true logic to it, but it was factual nonetheless. Natasha’s dark blue eyes drifted to Darcy and then down to the empty bottle of champagne in her hands. She felt rage slowly filling her, starting at her toes and rising through her legs to her chest and up into her throat. She wanted to shriek her rage, to scream her defiance at all those who would deny her. She would blame the alcohol.

One toned arm lifted and the heavy glass bottle flew from her hand and shattered against the wall of the building, showering bits of broken glass onto the balcony floor. Darcy didn’t flinch. She just stared at Natasha like the redhead had done exactly as she expected. It wasn’t a look such a vibrant young woman she carry on her shoulders. Natasha twitched the dress back into place, smoothing a hand down her stomach for a moment before turning fully to the younger woman.

“Darcy.” She waited until the girl had turned toward her. “Go to bed.” She was standing straight and tall in the column of fire red silk that she’d worn to the party earlier. She didn’t tell Darcy she would try and fix this, she didn’t tell her she believed those feelings anyone else would have dismissed. She was drunk enough to want to believe a young girl’s claims about feelings. It was a fanciful train of thought, and yet Natasha suddenly believed it with every fiber of her body and she needed to think on it further.

“Bed. Right.” Darcy unfolded herself from the chair slowly and walked barefoot across the balcony floor, ignoring the broken glass beneath her feet. It was a testament of just how not-well Darcy truly was. Six months later and she might be worse than the day Natasha had first seen her, broken and crying on Pepper Potts. The image might have haunted her if she hadn’t been more focused on Clint at the time.

Once Darcy had gone back toward her own room Natasha moved to the kitchen. Her dangerously high heels were discarded, tossed in the direction of the couch, and her dress was hiked up to her thighs as she hopped up onto a counter rather than sitting on a chair. She knew just where Tony kept his top shelf Vodka and pulled out three bottles to fortify her as she considered all the possibilities of Darcy’s feelings and words.

Because Yasha.


	13. Curse The Love Songs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drunken Natasha.

Two empty bottles of Vodka sat beside Natasha and she was working on a third. A half empty bottle of orange juice showed she might have attempted a chaser in the beginning to try and cut the effect of the alcohol. Tony, Steve, and Clint had thought a snack sounded like a good idea after the parties tauntingly tiny finger foods. They had not expected to find Natasha Romanoff sitting on the kitchen counter with a bottle of vodka in one hand and a knife gripped in the other. It was a striking image, one Steve wanted to immediately put on paper. It was so rare to see the woman not in complete control of herself.

“Enjoying yourself there, Nat?” Clint asked warily, moving between Tony and the redhead. He knew his partner well, almost as well as he knew Tony’s ability to talk his way into trouble.

“Joy is for the weak, I am drinking to oblivion.” Natasha responded, her voice thick with Mother Russia. The accent (which was new for Steve and Tony) made Clint’s eyes pop wide open. He was looking distinctly worried at this point.

“Fuck it, I’m in.” Tony snagged a bottle of scotch and gave Natasha a quick salute.

“People drinking to joy all night long, there is no joy. There is darkness and despair, and then there is alcohol for the times when you need to force yourself to move past the darkness. The darkness will not leave though, someday it just swallows you whole and all that’s left is a body.” Natasha informed him, her voice rolling through vowels and mushing her consonants. Steve had known she was Russian on some level, but it had never really occurred to him before that English was not her first language.

“Natasha, how about you let me have a shot?” Clint offered, his amiable smile a bit brittle at the edges as he shifted close to his partner. She sneered at the man, motioning for him to back off with the hand that gripped a rather sharp looking blade. “Really?” He demanded a moment later when she slashed out at him because he didn’t move away fast enough.

“You act like being drunk means I lose all sense! I know you though, man with eyes of hawk - you wish me to stop drinking, you think to manipulate me!” Her voice had risen as she glowered at Clint and he sighed a bit. Steve was fascinated by the dynamic of the two. Clint was obviously wary of the woman, knowing first hand how incredibly dangerous she was, but he was still protective of her.

“Let the woman be! It’s a night for mourning,” Tony informed the archer, drinking his scotch straight from the bottle and eyeing Natasha with a hint of glee. That would probably not be ending well.

“You. Poruchik America - drink to remember the dead cannot feel joy and neither shall we on this day!” Natasha announced decisively, lifting the vodka to her lips and drinking deeply.

“Uh ... Clint?” Steve turned to the Archer and the other man pulled out some of the moonshine Tony liked to keep on hand for nights when he wanted to “feel earthy.”

“There’s not much point in arguing with her at the moment.” Clint informed him. The look of resignation on the other man’s face might have amused him at another point, but he was half afraid laughing would set Natasha off. He wasn’t really sure what she was talking about anyhow.

“Come, the vodka is our enemy and so shall we utterly consume it!” Natasha announced, lifting the bottle once more.

“And then the Russian Proverbs,” Clint muttered, sighing as he settle back and motioned for Steve to drink with the redhead. It was much better than him drinking with her. Steve wasn’t likely to get alcohol poisoning trying to keep up with her, or catch up with her in this case. Freaking engineered people and their inability to get easily plastered.

“Not that I’m disliking drunk you or anything, but what brought this on?” Tony asked, taking another pull. Clint eyed the bottle and noticed despite the many swallows the genius was apparently taking, the level in the bottle wasn’t falling as drastically as it could be. Apparently even Tony Stark was nervous enough not to want to get plastered with the Black Widow. And here Clint had always thought he was at least subconsciously suicidal.

“Life.” Natasha informed him decisively after a moments pause.

“Which is to say Death.” Steve responded, not sure why. It was something Bucky had said. Natasha’s eyes zeroed in on him, pinning him to his seat.

“Drink to both.” She told him, her voice soft and dangerous. He lifted the bottle and took a few swallows, keeping his eyes locked on hers. He pulled the bottle away from his mouth and narrowed his eyes.

“Because it’s all a guy can count on.” He finished, staring at her with a grim face as she tilted her head, red curls spilling across her shoulder as she eyed him like a cat. Even Tony stayed silent, watching the two of them stare at one another as though if they blinked they would lose.

“Nat,” Clint’s voice was wary as he eyed Cap this time. Steve didn’t get upset often, and usually it ended with things like bad guys missing teeth. The archer moved a bit to the side, getting in Steve’s line of sight so he’d know the marksman was Natasha’s first. Always.

“It's the still waters that are inhabited by devils. The words unspoken will rise to the surface and none shall stop them when they come to light, for there is no knowledge greater than spoken word.” Natasha trailed off and began speaking softly in her native tongue, eyes still locked on Steve’s.

“What is she saying?” The man out of time demanded. Clint shared a glance with Tony, but the other man was conspicuously silent. Someday Clint would have to explain the various stages of Drunken Natasha - the final stage being a room full of corpses. 

“She says that true love never dies, that it just sleeps until it can be rekindled.” Clint told him. There was more she was saying, but he didn’t share those. Some things he could let the woman keep to herself. Broken hearts were not something Natasha would want advertised when she was sober and less ... melancholy.

“Natasha, where did you hear that saying.” Steve snapped, interrupting her apparent ramblings. He knew zero Russian so he couldn’t understand anything she was saying, but the bitter twist of her lips told him he probably didn’t want to. She paused in her muttering and then slid off the counter and stalked toward him. She knocked Clint’s arm wide when he reached for her and slid into Steve’s personal space, holding the knife up to his throat before he’d quite realized she would move so fast while so obviously drunk.

“Yasha.” She told him, leaning in so close that the knife was as close to her as it was to him. Steve focused on the woman before him, ignoring Tony holding back Clint and Clint furiously whispering at the other man. They weren’t important right now. He didn’t need them to tell him something which meant everything, he needed it from Natasha.

“Who is Yasha.” Steve asked, pulling the vodka out of her hand and throwing it across the room without stepping away from the knife. She didn’t flinch, she didn’t cry, she smiled. Like it was sweet he would throw a half empty fifth of vodka.

“The Winter Soldier,” She taunted, knowing he would dislike it. He leaned forward, letting the knife press against his throat. He was a man out of time, a man lost in every sense of the word. He had no one, he had nothing. All he had loved was gone, all those he had loved were gone. Nothing was right in his world, he had missed everything. Closed his eyes and woken up to something which was sometimes worse than the war he had left behind. The only thing he truly wanted from the bottom of his heart was for home. Barring that, he wanted someone who could at least remind him of what it felt like to _have_ a home. Someone who could make him feel loved for who he was, not what he could do, someone like Bucky.

Bucky was family. The brother of his soul, the one who treated him the same before the serum as he did after the serum. Bucky saw Steve, not Captain America. He saw the dreamer, the lover, the good man he always had been. He accepted him, and the raw, gaping hole in Steve was still wide open from the pain of losing him. Of _still_ not being good enough despite the serum and the training. Then here comes Natasha, flinging Bucky’s words at him.

“Who is the Winter Soldier.” Steve demanded, his voice gruff and his eyes hard. Natasha’s grip on the knife didn’t lessen as her shoulders relaxed and the manic, daring grin on her face disappeared. Winter Soldier had been Steve’s first, but he belonged to Natasha now. Steve had lost him and she had found him.

“Yasha isn’t dead.” She told him after a few moments, her face shuttered once more so all he could see was the usual mask of indifference. He wanted to hit her, but she continued to speak. “Bucky isn’t dead. They are Winter Soldier, and they are death.” She informed him, pushing back and snatching the scotch from Tony’s suddenly slack fingers.

“What the hell did you just say?” Steve demanded, his chest heaving with a sudden onslaught of emotion, a ghost of the asthma he had spent an entire lifetime fighting with.

“I will steal him back once I locate him.” Natasha responded, making a face as she took a gulp of the scotch. “Phil too.” She added, leaving the kitchen and heading toward her own rooms. Her knife could be sharper.

“Tony.” Clint’s voice cut through the ringing in Steve’s ears and made the blond’s head whip in their direction.

“On it.” Tony had a screen up and was tapping away for information before he’d even finished responding verbally. It was going to be a long night.


	14. Empty As That Beating Drum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil and Bucky Interlude.

Phil brushed dust off of his arm, a faint frown on his face as he inspected the fabric. No hole, that was a blessing. It wasn’t easy getting new suits when the tailor he’d been using didn’t have the clearance level to know he was still alive. Darcy had liked to taunt him about his love for a well cut suit and how one day he’d have to go without. He hadn’t realized just how much he disliked off the rack suits. He’d become spoiled, in a sense, to a different type of dressing. This suit was one of only three he had deemed wearable, sending the rest away with a stony expression.

The man on the floor was looking at him in confusion. Phil looked back at him and frowned some more. Here he had thought they’d been making progress and Barnes had attacked him. Though technically he’d been ready to attack the next one through the door and hadn’t really known it was going to be Phil. He certainly hadn’t expected Phil (who was still not at full strength, much to his irritation) to tase him. It was not the reaction of most SHIELD agents. Most of them shot him, or at least attempted to shoot him.

“I understand you had a question regarding your current housing situation.” Agent Coulson said, twitching his jacket a bit straighter before folding his hands together in front of him. Mastering understatement was something Phil had done as a child, finding it was easier to sooth a mother who was prone to severe anxiety and hypochondria. Darcy was another who was good at understatement, that and redirection. There was a possibility it was why both of them could deal with geniuses on a daily level without maiming someone.

“I believe my question had a few more expletives, but you could say that.” Barnes agreed a moment later, slowly climbing to his feet with his flesh hand pressed against his opposite shoulder. His arm was only metal from the elbow down, which left a lot of prime target space if you knew what you were doing. Phil knew what he was doing.

“You have been deemed dangerous, Mr. Barnes, dangerous to both yourself and the populace at large. As such you are required to stay in SHIELD facilities until such a time as you can be trusted to be among civilians without reverting to program.” The agent took a seat on a hard backed chair across the room, leaning back without slouching or relaxing visibly. The door was locked and coded and at least four agents were waiting on the other side in case things went bad. Pierce was likely out there as well, not liking this in the least and probably giving the door a dirty look as she devised more tests to make Phil uncomfortable in her presence.

“So I’m a prisoner.” It was a statement, not a question, and definitely held some animosity.

“I believe my response had a few more politically polite terms, but you could say that.” Phil kept his face bland and uninterested even as he smirked just a bit inside at the startled look on Barnes’ face. The other man hadn’t expected his words to be thrown back in his face. They stayed in stalemate position across the room from one another for a few long minutes, Phil sitting and Bucky standing. Bucky cracked first.

“I’m never going to get better.” He told the other man. His voice sounded definite, but his eyes didn’t look so sure. It was as though he wanted Phil to deny it, maybe he even needed the denial on some level. Phil could have denied it, the proper response would have been instant denial with a hint of deflection. Not even a year ago he would have said the words, wheedled his way into the other man’s comfort zone with a distant sort of affection and then walked away once the mission was over without more than a couple backward glances when he knew they wouldn’t be noticed. Instead Phil decided to try something new.

Phil was honest.

“Maybe not.” He nodded, thinking of Darcy in the moment. She would have given some speech about what was right and what was wrong and what was actually real. Truth, after all, was gray and muddy - black and white were lies people told themselves when they needed a handy excuse, or at least she’d told Phil as much after a few mojito’s one night as they were watching Pretty Woman (her pick) and she painted her toenails. She’d explained what the movie meant to her, what it meant to Jane, what it meant to the general populace, and then she asked what he took from it. Upon a few moments of reflection Phil had told her he loved that a story so relevant to the past could be reformatted with very little change and gifted to the present. Everything changes, but it doesn’t mean it will be unrecognizable. She’d called him a softie and then thrown herself at him with a reckless abandon he was rather fond of.

“Way to sell it.” Bucky’s voice was thick with sarcasm as he slouched further against the wall.

“I’m not here to sell you anything, Mr. Barnes. I’m here to see you through to whatever end it is you seek. As you seem to think we are all villains of some kind I shall point out that to protect our country, you have been labeled top secret and as such no one in this facility gets to talk to anyone outside. I have people who I miss and at this point I simply want an ending. The ending, of course, is up to you. So far, to me, it seems you are choosing self destruction. Using an Agent of SHIELD as your means of destruction is a fairly safe bet. We do tend to be decent shots.” The words didn’t bother Phil, the meaning behind them did but only a bit. Bucky Barnes was another man out of time, but he was also a victim of decades of psychological torture and reprogramming.

Bucky stared silently at the other man, running the words through his mind and trying to find hidden meanings and secret traps within the words. He couldn’t find any, but that didn’t mean they weren’t there. It simply meant Coulson was very, very good. Didn’t mean there wasn’t a grain of truth to them, though. The best lies, the most convincing, were the ones which were almost reality. The ones which were just shy of honest. The ones which sounded like they **_could_** be real, like they _should_ be real. He dropped his chin to his chest and began slamming his fist on the wall beside him as he tried to figure out fact from fiction, reality from fantasy. What was his real past? What were the lies? Weren’t the lies he lived still real? Weren’t the things he did still wrong? What _was he_?

The man known as Winter Soldier, the most feared assassin from the frozen North, curled himself into a ball made of muscle and just a hint of metal and began to rock back and forth, slamming his back into the wall as he tried to understand who he was and had been and what he must be. Colors flashed behind his eyes, pictures of people and places, and he let out a gut wrenching sob as he fell to the side, still curled up, and began to scream.

Phil sank down against the other wall and waved out the guards who had come running. They shut and locked the door and Phil loosened his tie, stretching out his legs in front of him. It was going to be a long night and he wasn’t about to leave the other man by himself through all of this. He had a woman he cared a great deal for who couldn’t be here, he would be vigilant for her. His eyes moved to one of the camera’s and he gave it his most dour look. They had taken his entire life, they had taken him from those he cared about. They had maneuvered Phil Coulson in such a way he knew he couldn’t leave here. Leaving would mean Bucky would have no one on his side. Leaving would mean Phil would have Darcy at his side, maybe.

They thought to control him, and for now it would work. He could play the long game though, he’d mastered it long ago. Apparently Nick had forgotten that, or was simply assuming it would never get to the final round. Phil chose not to think too deeply about that, Nick was more likely to underestimate him based on the fact he’d never before disobeyed a direct order. So Phil would wait, he would think, and he would get himself and Bucky out. Pierce too, she deserved better.

As the Winter Soldier screamed for hours on end, Phil Coulson sat mere feet away against the wall and glared balefully into that same camera the entire time.


	15. You've Got Your Demons and Darling They All Look Like Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's gonna start picking up speed here!

They had agreed not to tell Darcy. It failed the instant she locked eyes on a fidgeting Steve. The girl could be a ferret, the way she tracked down every person, and then sweet talked JARVIS into letting her into Tony’s private workshop. A place she (and Pepper) refused to call his Fortress of Solitude. No, Tony, wearing almost the same shade of red did not make you as awesome as Superman, but it was cute you thought so. He’d been very put out when Darcy had informed him Iron Man wasn’t cool enough for her to wear his undies. It had distracted him enough he hadn’t noticed when she’d taken one of his tablets and deftly slipped through his firewalls to see what it was he didn’t want her to know he was working on. 

Later Tony would demand to know how she pulled that off, it had been far too easy for her. For now, though, he was more concerned by how wide her eyes had gotten and the fact that her face had lost all color as she sat down hard, missing the stool and going to the floor, and half curled up against the steel stool and blinked as the search continued. It was a simple enough facial search algorithm, the tricky part was making sure SHIELD didn’t catch it hacking into their “invisible” security feeds. Really though, if they wanted that, they’d need a closed circuit feed which went to a computer with no internet access, and even then it wouldn’t be impossible to get into. He dismissed the train of thought and flopped onto the dirty floor of his workshop, pulling his knees to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. He was close enough Darcy could reach him if she felt the need to. 

“Is he really alive?” The words were soft, almost silent. It was half desperate hope and half terrified certainty it couldn’t be true. 

“Agent is alive.” Tony told her after a lengthy pause. She didn’t looked up from where her eyes were caressing the screen capture he’d made of security footage. 

“Why isn’t he here,” _with me,_ she wouldn’t say the last part out loud. She had pride and she was smart enough to realize if Phil wasn’t here, he wasn’t allowed to be. Besides, he was using a cane in this picture. Phil would _never_ show weakness like that if he didn’t have to. The crows feet around his eyes seemed deeper, there was no hint of a smile on his face, instead there was a bland sort of frown. He was unhappy. 

“I don’t know.” Tony felt his hands curl into fists and he lashed out, slamming the side of a fist against the table for a moment. Darcy’s blue eyes turned to him, she didn’t judge him. She accepted he didn’t know and thought nothing else of it, she was a good kid and it was probably incredibly stupid of her to trust him. “Yet. I don’t know _yet_.” He was staring at her, intense and verging on emotional. Why the hell did she trust him and why the hell did he feel the need to assure her? 

The genius unfolded himself and stood up, moving over to his workbench and pulling up more information on the search for Phil. He’d found Bucky, of course, which was what had led him to Phil, but he couldn’t figure out where they were. He knew where they had been. Or at least some of where Phil had been. SHIELD had paid the bills for the hospital Phil had “died” in for a full three days after the man’s supposed death. The doctor who had called it and signed the certificate of death was in LA, and had been for a week prior to Phil’s death. Pepper had actually discovered that. She’d said something about never being able to hide things from admin. She would definitely be the one to know. 

“This is the Hellicarrier.” Darcy was at his side, elbows tucked in close and his tablet gripped tight in her hands. Tony ran a finger over the image and then flicked it onto the transparent screen in front of him. 

“Four is a bit much for an escort,” Tony remarked, making the image larger and instantly setting up search parameters for images of the guards as well as the video footage. 

“Unless you’re more of a prisoner than a guest,” Tony didn’t jump, but it was a close thing. Darcy did, but Clint didn’t usually get the slip on her. He didn’t usually try though, he wasn’t immune to tasers. 

“Nick thinks he’s tricky, setting it up so the regular camera’s are all turned off down this section of hallway, but he didn’t get the cross sections,” Tony remarked pulling up more and more brief glimpses of the man. 

“Wait! There, back up two frames,” Clint was pointing, his eyes focused hard on the image as the three of them stood side by side. Tony backed it up and froze the image. There he was, Phil Coulson, eyes wide and face looking more anguished than anything else. His hand lifted just enough to be noticeable if you were looking for it. Maria Hill was at his side and looking purposefully away, as though she wouldn’t be the one to stop him should he make a break for it. The three other guards had all started moving in on Phil at that point.

Tony tossed the screencap onto another screen and then continued the feed. An arm slammed into Phil’s chest and the ninja winced, making Darcy growl and Clint tense up. Tony frowned, crossing one arm over his chest and lifting a hand to his mouth as he watched intently. A moment later Agent took half a step back and crossed his hands in front of him. They moved out of sight a moment later. 

“Sir, if I may?” JARVIS interrupted their silent musings and Tony waved a hand. A new video replaced the last image before JARVIS continued. “I noticed that this was taken the same day Ms. Lewis was asked to deliver reports to the Hellicarrier and deemed the reasoning “specious at best”. I took the liberty of checking the feeds and it appears the reason Agent Coulson was distracted was because he saw Ms. Lewis.” 

“I was called to the Hellicarrier to be used as a test. I was bait.” The words were oddly hollow and a glance at Darcy confirmed her face was blank. She was on the verge of one of her rages. This was the sort of thing which led to tasing Fury in his own office and throwing the toaster at Thor.


	16. Sometimes I Wonder If I Disappear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil decides Bucky needs a field trip.

“I’m not sure if this is the best idea I’ve ever heard, or the worst.” Bucky sounded more amused than pained so Phil decided to roll with it as he held up a closed fist so the other man wouldn’t move.

“It’s a training exercise.” That was going to be his mantra. It would (hopefully) protect the man who was still known as Winter Soldier. He’d been having fewer and fewer episodes of late and as a reward Phil thought it was about time for some decent food for the man. He certainly ate enough, his body burning off calories the way the sun burned off water in the desert. A larger part of the “exercise” might have had a bit more to do with Phil’s own displeasure at being locked away like some sort of prisoner.

“Right. Training.” Bucky’s sardonic words were blithely ignored by the Special Agent as

he dropped his arm and the two rushed down the hall and slid through an open door. The door clicked shut quietly behind them and Phil pulled the tried and true chair-under-the-door-handle trick. Buck gave it a solid kick, wedging the metal against the concrete with a grin.

“Hold this.” Phil was draping his jacket across Bucky’s arm and climbing up to remove the metal grating along the ceiling. This didn’t open into something as trite as a duct, oh no, there was eighteen inches of steel lined squared tunnel and then grating into another room which was on the other side of two security checks. He’d downloaded the blueprints for the base onto his iPad (he wasn’t allowed to use Stark Tech. He had the feeling it was due to JARVIS.)

Bucky followed Phil through the hole in the wall, wiggling a bit more, he was built wider than the Special Agent. Phil mostly ignored the struggle as he dusted off his jacket and then slipped it back on. No need to look messy if you weren’t bleeding to death. Even then you didn’t need to look messy, when he’d been bleeding to death his suit had been pristine, if you ignored the blood. He’d checked the footage to make sure. Pierce had been unimpressed.

“This seems a lot like an escape.” Bucky mentioned a moment later as Phil pulled the two agents he’d downed into an empty office. He noticed his keeper seemed to be as much under surveillance as he himself, but he hadn’t commented on it. Coulson liked to keep things close to the vest and the older man could understand. Besides, apparently Special Agent was enjoying doing all the heavy work and Bucky was kind of enjoying not being relied on for the violence.

“As I said, this is merely a training exercise.” Coulson twitched his jacket back into place and the two of them strode out a side door and into a dirty alley which smelled of urine. Phil cleared his throat and pulled his spine a bit straighter as he led Bucky to the street and raised a hand into the air. The soldier started to ask what he was doing when a taxi skidded to a stop in front of them. Phil’s generally implacably look might have become a big smug.

“Impressive.” Bucky commented. It was though, hailing a cab was not exactly an easy endeavor in the middle of New York City, not when your suit wasn’t of a certain calibre. Phil had that kind of attitude about him, though, the one which said you wanted to do whatever he wanted you to do, because you wouldn’t like the consequences if you didn’t. He kind of reminded Bucky of the nuns who had taught at the catholic school he’d gone to as a child. He would never tell Phil that, though.

“Where to?” The cabbie asked, half turning toward them.

“Head North.” Phil’s answer was short and clear, his face calm. The cabbie shrugged and drove. Phil had him change directions no less than seven times before asking him to stop at a corner. They were charged just over sixty dollars and Phil pulled out a thick leather wallet and pulled out four crisp twenties. The face on the drivers license inside the wallet was not Phil’s. Bucky decided not to ask.

“This way,” Phil walked into a building and cut through the lobby, then took the stairs down a level. They walked quietly through cubicles without being stopped. It must have been the calmly focused look on Phil’s face, people assumed you knew what you were doing and where you were going and that you belonged. They would only be right on two counts. The duo went up a set of emergency stairs and out an emergency exit. They cut through three more buildings and then entered the last.

“So when are we done with this “exercise”?” Bucky asked as Phil held up two fingers and was waved through to the next room.

“Do you have something better to do?” The Special Agent asked him calmly. Bucky stared at him and then shook his head, laughing quietly. 

“Is this a joke of some sort?” Bucky asked a few moments later, looking over at the other man, laughter still on his lips, but a wary look to his eyes. They stayed, gazes locked as a woman walked up to them.

“Welcome to Ihop, I’m Trudy and I’ll be your server today.” The woman smiled brightly at them, oblivious to the tension which was swiftly bleeding away from the pair as Phil grinned rather mischievously.


	17. I Can Hear The Dark Hearts Marching But I Wont Go Down Easily

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's see the last chapter from another perspective, shall we?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Birthday to the best Beta Author a girl could ask for, Tiziano! The good twin gets a present that will hopefully make the rest of you happy as well.

“This should not be turning me on as much as it is.” Darcy commented as she sat between Clint and Tony, her head tilted as she watched Natasha and Bruce duke it out (figuratively) to see who would be the twister champion. Apparently all that yoga made the super-scientist incredibly limber. Tony hummed in agreement, also studying the pair. Clint made a grunt which could have meant all kinds of things, but Darcy chose to believe he was agreeing with her as well.

“Tony!” The reproachful tone in Pepper’s voice was a the note which meant ‘don’t objectify the people who are supposed to be your friends’ rather than one which meant she thought they should all stop what they were doing. None of the men seemed to be immune to that look, it was actually quite amusing. She had just come in the room and heard Darcy’s comment and Tony’s agreement.

“Have you actually looked at them?” Darcy demanded, gesturing wildly at the two as Jane flicked the wheel and announced “right hand blue”. She watched Pepper’s reaction to the other redhead twisting her body so her hand was reaching under her for the blue spot as Bruce calmly moved his hand over without much trouble. The two of them were entwined in a way which was considered indecent in most southern states.

“We can hear you,” Bruce commented a moment later as he wound a leg through Natasha’s arms to get his right foot on yellow.

“That’s half the fun,” Darcy retorted instantly.

“Sir, I hate to interrupt.” JARVIS did sound rather regretful this time as he spoke through the speakers.

“JARVIS, add Contortionism to the list of kinks on my SexWiki, would you?” Tony responded, watching Natasha arch her chest against Bruce’s side to get her right foot on red.

“Of course, Sir.” If he could have sighed, he would have. The AI could certainly convey his feelings with tonal inflection though, and he made good use of it as he continued. “I thought you might like to know Agent Coulson and James Buchanan are currently walking through a Stark subsidiary building in Williamsburg.”

The AI’s announcement froze Jane. The scientist stared blankly at Darcy, as the younger girl darted to Tony’s side as the genius called up the large viewing screens he seemed to have installed in every room in the Tower. Her bathroom included. Pepper joined Darcy, gripping the younger woman’s hand as her jaw clenched and her gaze flitted from screen to screen.

“Where is he coming from?” Now Natasha had joined them, Steve and Clint right behind her. Thor stood as well, but he stayed beside his Lady Jane, a hand on her shoulder. Bruce came to join them, making an odd sort of Trio who watched the rest. They didn’t feel as strong a pull to Agent Coulson or Bucky, or even Yasha. They could (and would) support their friends though.

“Jarvis, find where he is coming from and trace it back on screen three.” Tony gave a twisting flick of his fingers and a screen turned toward Natasha and began to trace Phil and Bucky back to their starting point.

“He’s leaving, where is he going?” Darcy’s voice sounded oddly panicked as she watched Phil stride out of the building without a second glance behind him.

“He picked up a tail, there,” Clint pointed at a pair of nondescript looking men in simple suits weaving through the halls. They didn’t speak into their cuffs or collars, they might not have been in communication at all, but they were definitely following Phil and Bucky. Darcy nodded and wrapped an arm around her ribs, the hand holding Pepper’s tightening.

“Looks like Agent has learned to break some rules.” Tony grinned fiercely as Phil entered another building. This one, too, was a Stark subsidiary. Clint clapped Tony on the shoulder and took off down the hall without saying a word. Natasha was quiet at her spot, freezing the image here and there as she traced the duo to a Taxi and moved backwards from there. She could be patient, Black Widow, sitting in the center of her web and waiting for just the right moment to spring to action. She fought as much with her head as she did with her body.

“That’s wonderful. I’d like to congratulate him in person, if you don’t mind.” Darcy replied, her voice oddly calm as her eyes locked onto the man’s face. He looked calm, but he wasn’t moving quickly and there was an odd jerk to his gait which hadn’t been there before.

“Did he just glance up at the camera?” Pepper raised an eyebrow as she stared at the image. The video continued, switching from camera to camera as the Agent did a strange loop through the building, going up one level and down two more. On another screen JARVIS brought up the image Pepper had commented on and the willowy redhead stared at the image as Phil glanced up at the corner with a small smile twisted his lips for half an instant. If the AI hadn’t frozen the image she might have thought she’d imagined it.

“I knew he missed me.” Darcy’s voice was nonchalant now, and a smile was slowly spreading across her lips as she brought a thumb up and began gnawing on the end.

“How could he not? Your superpower involves puppy dog eyes and guilting people into doing what you want them to.” Tony paused and looked over at Darcy. “Are you Jewish?”

“Tony.” Pepper’s voice was now at ‘you are dangerously close to crossing the line and sleeping on the couch so I can keep you from destroying the company with your anti-PC approach to life’.

“I was a bubbe in a past life.” Darcy assured Tony, smoothly ignoring the wounded look Pepper sent her way.

“Out they go,” Steve commented, still watching carefully from behind them. He sent a few longing looks down the hall after Clint, but he stayed where he was.

“And into door number three,” Tony replied, snagging a tablet from a nearby table (the things were laying out everywhere) and starting to tap away at it quickly, glancing up now and then to see what was going on with Phil and Bucky.

“Another Stark Subsidiary?” Darcy asked, glancing over at Pepper.

“Yes.” Pepper nodded and stared with wide, worried eyes at the picture before her. She, too, had noticed the slower and more careful movements of the Agent she considered a very dear friend.

“I’m starting to get insulted. He didn’t think I’d catch on after the first one? I’ve had JARVIS running facial screenings for weeks now, as soon as he popped out of hiding he was mine.” Tony sounded a bit offended, just enough so Darcy turned and snarled at him. Phil was _hers_ , not Tony’s. The genius ignored her, of course, and Pepper tossed her arm around the shorter woman’s shoulders.

“Tony, please focus on the important issues.” Pepper told him, a sigh in her words.

“I am! Obviously he’s had brain damage if he thinks I’m this slow.” Tony snarked as Phil entered building number 4.

“Except he doesn’t know we know he isn’t really dead.” Jane piped up from her spot on the couch, her knees tucked up against her chest and her arms wrapped around them as Thor gently rubbed her shoulders.

“Fair enough.” Tony ceded the argument after a moment of glancing between Jane and Pepper. The former was offering him an out from the latter’s wrath. He needed to remember to do something nice to her. Maybe bed shackles? Something to think more on at a later time.

“Emergency exit.” Steve pointed as Phil and Bucky left the building.

“JARVIS get me street eyes.’ Tony ordered, the AI had the images up before he’d finished speaking though.

“Stuffed pancakes.” Darcy said a moment later, spotted the sign before the two men entered the establishment.

“Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.” Pepper smiled a bit, sharing a joke which only she and Darcy and possibly Natasha would understand. Phil was overly fond of breakfast foods and was willing to eat bacon at every meal.

“We had our first date there. It was one o’clock in the morning and I was starving and Phil said he knew a place which was still open. He likes stuffed pancakes.” Darcy wasn’t sure if she wanted to laugh or cry at the memory, but she felt like it meant the whole world that he’d gone into that Ihop.

“Why aren’t we going there?” Jane asked after a moment. Not sure she understood what was going on completely. She did not like not understanding things, but spy stuff wasn’t in her purview so she could forgive her failings this time.

“This is not an escape. This is call for attention.” Thor responded calmly. While many saw him as tall, blond, and oafish the man was a brilliant leader and did understand the complexities of battle. He was a mean hand at Chess, too, once Bruce explained the game to him. It didn’t surprise anyone who had taken the time to know him.

“This was Agent’s way of saying he was tired of being tucked away wherever Fury is hiding him.” Tony responded, pulling feeds from every camera he could get hold of in the area. If it was on a wifi feed, that picture was going to be his. New York might not be ready for full time attention from Tony Stark, but it was going to have to get used to being his newest toy.

“Is Clint wearing my shirt?” Steve leaned forward to eye a man in an oversized shirt and thick rimmed glasses, his shoulders hunched a bit and his attention on his phone as his head bobbed to the music that must have been coming from his head phones. No one was paying any attention to him, including the team of four agents that had just shown up and were scanning the streets. The nondescript man held the door open for the four agents, offering a distracted smile as one of the men thanked him, and then entering behind the group.

Ten minutes later the four agents left with Phil and Bucky. The two escapees holding bags with styrofoam containers inside. Apparently they’d ordered to go. Darcy felt the laughter bubble up from her chest and shook her head as she took a half step forward and lifted a hand to trace the a finger down Phil’s face.

“I miss you too.” She announced, smiling fondly at his face and ignoring everyone else in the room.


	18. We Can't Escape This Ricochet, I'm Ready For This War

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Phil, Nick, and Maria sit in a room ...

Nick had descended from his sky fortress. Apparently people were not amused at Phil’s training exercise. He’d described it as an effort of “Awareness of one’s surroundings, using your wits to get through a foreign city, and evading detection while encouraging a rescue attempt”. Not that he’d been speaking of himself, of course, as he worked for SHIELD and therefore couldn’t be their prisoner. He was a bit smug at the instant security crack-down his little jaunt had spawned. 

James had passed with flying colors, of course. The agents sent after him had failed, not that he was going to point it out just yet. A great deal of it, of course, was due to Clint’s amazing ability to blend in with the background wherever he went. It was almost uncanny. The fact which the team hadn’t seen the reckless grin the archer had given his handler was disappointing to say the least. Once this mess had all been dealt with and he was back in position with the Avengers, Phil would have to do something about it. SHIELD Agents weren’t supposed to be so sloppy. Of course, in this instance it was working in his favor. 

Currently Phil was sitting at a table, his hands calmly folded on top as he ignored the cuffs which were keeping him attached to the table. He could play the long game and the cuffs were likely to send Nick skyrocketing into a rage. After all, Phil was an Agent, not a prisoner. There was the added bonus of Bucky having fought their ‘captors’ when they had split the two up. He’d been most upset that the man who was teaching him to be human once more was being treated like a criminal of some sort. 

The door opened and Phil didn’t even bother glancing to see who was coming in behind him. The room, a ten foot cube with a single door and a camera in a corner, was meant to put him off. Phil wasn’t easily put off. A heavy tread came through the door a moment after it opened, that would be Fury. He didn’t open his own doors if there were minions in the area, they all jumped to do it for him. It was something which drove Fury up the wall, he continually insisted he could open his own damn doors. Phil usually opened the door for him as he said as much. 

“Sir.” He gave a sharp, short nod as Fury came around his side to stand in front of him. They stared silently at one another for a few long moments, Fury’s face narrow with irritation and Phil’s pleasantly bland. The taller man noted the silver at his wrists and cursed.  
“Get the damn bracelets off of him,” He ground out. He stood there, glowering as an agent came forward and unlocked the cuffs only to have Phil fold his hands neatly on top of the table again.

“You are becoming a pain in my ass.” The Director finally ground out as he pulled out a chair and dropped down into it. The door closed behind Phil and Maria Hill came around the table, taking a seat beside Nick. When the Agent didn’t say anything in response, Maria silently slid a thin file in front of the taller man. Nick flipped it open and turned three pages without saying a word. 

“Agent Coulson, while you did not disobey direct orders you did attack your fellow agents.” Maria informed him. The other man turned his blandly pleasant gaze on the woman.

“It was all within trainer parameters. A test does not just fall to the obvious recipient to pass.” Phil informed her. Maria froze, recognizing the last half as something directly out of their training manual. 

“Be that as it may, there are rules in place for a reason. There are guidelines which must be followed and paperwork which needs to be filled out.” Maria responded stiffly. She was against this pseudo-interrogation, but she would do her job. 

“I deemed it Clearance Level 7.” Was the instantaneous response.

“Which requires approval from the Director or Deputy Director,” Nick bit out, turning his eye on the other man. It wasn’t like he was actually reading the report anyhow. 

“Unless there has been no contact within the last 72 hours.” Phil added, still completely unruffled. 

“That is in case of emergency.” Nick growled, carefully setting his hands on the table so he didn’t punch it. 

“That is not specified in the manual, sir.” The two men stared at each other, silent once more. Maria looked from one to the other, unsure about how this was all going to end. They needed Phil Coulson, he was one of their very best Agents and had more medals than 98 percent of the military. It didn’t matter that he didn’t wear them and they were mostly for doing jobs which would remain Eyes Only for decades to come. He was Agent Phillip J. Coulson. He was a legend and he was a hero. People respected and feared him in a way which was different than how they respected and feared Director Fury. 

“You were informed that you were dead to the Avengers. You were given orders.” Nick informed him after the seconds dragged into a full minute of silence. A minute of tense silence could feel like an hour. 

“My orders were not to contact the Avengers or any of their affiliates.” The Agent’s voice was firm and calm. He didn’t mention the orders regarding Buchanan, those were a separate issue at the moment and everyone knew there was no one better than Agent Coulson to bring in an operative and make him 100 percent SHIELD.

“You took a taxi and cut through four Stark shell companies.” The Director was shouting now, but he didn’t move from his seat. He didn’t stand or pace or slam a fist on the table. He was in control. 

“The shell companies are a subsidiary of Stark Industries, which belong to Pepper Potts, who is engaged to Tony Stark. I hadn’t realized you meant for me to stay away from the subsidiaries of the subsidiaries of the Avengers. That will make missions rather difficult, don’t you think?” He was still calm, he was still cool, and his hands hadn’t so much as twitched. Maria felt a small grin start to pull at her lips.

“So this is about Lewis.” Fury said it like he’d been hoping Coulson was better than this, like he was disappointed in the other man. Coulson’s eyes narrowed a touch and his voice went icy.

“This has always been about Lewis.” He assured the taller man. 

“You know how dangerous it is to form personal connections like this,” Nick continued, modulating his voice to sound understanding as though he were hurting for his agent. Maria could have told him it was the wrong approach, but she was there as his muscle.

“Do you know what will happen should someone attempt to use her against me?” His words were ice cold and there was a bit of a smile on his lips despite the relaxed pose of his body. An alarm began to blast through the building and neither man flinched. “It’s probably exactly what would happen should someone choose to use me against her.” He continued, the smile becoming a bit warmer and just a touch smug. 

“Sir?” Maria was on her feet, a gun in her hand and her back to the wall as she looked through the small window in the door. 

“Head to Security, check the feeds and make sure it isn’t AIM.” Fury ordered his second in command as he stood up and pulled his own gun. 

“You were expecting to move us before they showed.” It was a comment, not a question. Phil knew how the other man’s mind worked. 

“Not all of us are blind to Barton,” Fury remarked, his voice vaguely sardonic. He, too, had noticed his Agents hadn’t pegged the archer as a fellow SHIELD operative. 

“If I might suggest, a refresher course or two on subterfuge, might do well for that team.” Phil offered, turning in his seat to watch Nick, who had taken Maria’s post at the door. 

“Buchanan is a problem. He isn’t ready for the real world. I’m not ready to clear him to leave custody.” Nick informed the other man, already knowing there was no getting around the fact Phil was alive and therefore should not be kept locked up like a prisoner. It would just piss Natasha off more than she would already be due to Winter Soldier.

“Whatever you say, sir.” He continued, tossing an elbow over the back of the uncomfortable metal chair. Nick eyed the other man, not believing that comment for a moment. Lewis was a bad influence. A radio beeped and Maria Hill’s voice came out of it.

“It’s the Rescue Party, sir.” She informed them. Nick sighed heavily and tucked his gun in it’s holster as Phil passed him the clutch piece he kept in his ankle holster. The director blinked once at the gun in his hand and then looked over at Phil blankly. 

“Thank you for the loan, sir.” The man said, looking as blank as he always did. Nick didn’t want to know how he got the gun, or even _when_ he had gotten the gun. He simply knelt and tucked it back in it the holster at his ankle. 

Maria Hill came back into the doorway and nodded once to the director before glancing over at Phil. Fury stood up and walked out of the room without another glance behind him. Maria turned to watch him go and then focused on Phil once more, a small smile playing around her lips. 

“Your new orders are in the folder behind the medical and the operational assessments from your last maneuver. You are Officially the head of the SHIELD Avengers Initiative. Have a nice day.” She tipped her head to the side a bit and flicked her eyebrows upward just a hint before turning on her heel and striding after Fury.


	19. Every Siren Is A Symphony And Every Tear's A Waterfall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, with the "Avenger affiliates" back at the tower...

They’d left. The entire team had geared up and gone off all kitted out with their newest Superhero Accessories, and they’d left Darcy screaming at them from the balcony because, damn it, she wanted to rescue Phil! They hadn’t come up with a real plan, more of a basic guideline for how to sneak in. Only Tony said he didn’t feel like sneaking. On top of that JARVIS had already told her (twice) he was under orders not to keep her apprised of the situation, something she was _definitely_ going to be having words with Tony about later.

Pepper and Jane were having a glass of wine as they watched her pace and shout and rant at JARVIS for not taking her side. The AI had wisely chosen to stop defending himself after the first few minutes. She was working herself into a rage and she knew from past experience that coming down from it was going to leave her in a bawling mess of frayed emotions she would really rather not deal with.

She had two options at the moment. Stay angry and out here so she could yell at the team when they got back, whether Phil was with them or not, or she could head to her bedroom and cry herself out on her bed and refuse to acknowledge them, because they were all assholes anyway. Staying out and ranting some more gave her a better chance of seeing Phil as soon as he came in the door. Of course he’d be seeing her angry and blotchy and ranting about things which probably made sense to her even if it didn’t to him.

Why the hell was everything so gods damned complicated!?

Darcy shrieked wordlessly and stopped pacing to cover her face with her hands and take a few deep breaths. No, she had to calm down. None of this out of control shit. No. No, she could be a mature and vaguely responsible adult.

“It’s safe now.” Jane’s calm voice cut through her commentary, causing her to realize she was talking out loud and not in her head. Damn that word vomit.

“Darcy, drink this.” Pepper was standing in front of her as the younger woman let her hands slowly drop from her face. Sweet, perfect Pepper with an amused and rather understanding smile on her face and a glass of red wine in each hand. One of those hands was stretched out toward the brunette.

“Good idea.” She threw back the wine, downing the entire glass in one go before giving a gusty sigh.

“Better?” Jane asked from where she was sitting in the kitchen. Darcy nodded wordlessly and followed Pepper to her best friend and watched her glass get refilled.

“I am a mess right now.” Darcy mentioned, taking the glass back and looking into the deep red of the wine.

“Welcome to my life.” Pepper grumbled, sipping her own wine. Darcy turned a surprised look to the redhead.

“Really?” There was a hopefully tinge to the word and Jane giggled at it. She’d always had an odd sense of humor.

“Really.” Pepper laughed too, and that had Darcy relaxing between the two. “Tony drives me crazy sometimes, but it’s the worst when he’s off saving the world, and I don’t know where he is or what he’s doing.” Or if he’s coming back. She didn’t have to say it out loud though, it was written all over her face.

“It’s nice to know what I’ll be looking forward to.” Jane mentioned, looking into space as she contemplated the future.

“Says the woman who ripped a hole in space and time so she could get laid.” Pepper replied, her voice heavy with sarcasm. The look Jane gave her was so full of wounded affront that Darcy burst into giggles.

“We should start a club. Like the first wives club, but with less divorce and more super scientists villains.” The brunette decided.

“I’ve had enough of evil scientists to last me a lifetime.” Pepper mentioned, her voice sounding tired but firm.

“We need Natasha to teach us how to break a man’s neck with our thighs.” Jane told them, intrigued by the idea. She had been since she’d seen video of just that happening. It was impressive.

“Just what we need, more screams coming from your room.” Darcy flipped back at the petite scientist.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jane demanded.

“We all know what gets the big guy excited.” Pepper cocked an unimpressed eyebrow at Jane and the scientist deflated a bit, smiling sheepishly. That might have been a _tiny_ part of it.

“I don’t hear you complaining about the idea,” Jane grumbled. The wicked smile which appeared on the redhead’s lips was one the public never got to see.

“And you never will.” Pepper assured the shorter woman, tipping her head back to drain the last of the wine in her cup and then tipping the bottle back into her glass.

“You’re a total dom in the bed, aren’t you?” Darcy asked, staring at the other woman in fascination.

“Depends on my mood.” Pepper gave a gallic shrug and passed the bottle of wine to Jane. As the three settled in to wait for their people to get back. It was over an hour before JARVIS gave them the news that the team had returned. He didn’t say anything else and Darcy felt her heart begin hammering in her chest. She stood slowly, following Pepper and Jane to the door and watching the elevator at the end of the hall as the lights counted down the floor. When it dinged a moment later and the doors slid open the team spilled out of it, laughing and smiling. They were ecstatic. Happier than she’d ever seen them. Like something had been broken, and no one had even noticed it until it was magically healed.

They stepped out of the elevator, laughing and smiling, and in the center of it all was Agent Phil Coulson. Her heart thudded again and Darcy felt hysterical laughter bubble up in her chest. He took a step forward, and another, the smile frozen on his face when he spotted her. Like all he wanted to do was stare at her. To drink her in.

“Phil.’ It was a breathy whisper which sounded nothing like her. She took a faltering step and then a more confident one and then she was running down the hall and throwing herself at the man who had made her lose all control of herself. He reached forward to pull her in close and in his excitement completely missed the fist she threw at his face.


	20. So Give Me All You’ve Got, I Can Take It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy and Phil are finally reunited!

“Ninja’s aren’t supposed to die, you asshole!” She was yelling at him. This was not the reunion he had expected, but then he should have known better than to expect something specific from Darcy. She could be mercurial in her moods. Tony, for his part, was half hanging on Bruce and laughing hysterically while Pepper and Jane opened another bottle of wine and refilled their glasses. They were a bit too glassy eyed for this to be their first bottle.

“Can I kiss you now?” He asked, making a sound somewhere between a laugh and a sigh as he looked down into Darcy’s face. She glowered at him.

“Yes, but don’t think I’m gonna let it go if you die on me again.” She told him, popping up on her toes and pressing her lips against his softly. It was chaste and sweet and she was half afraid he was going to disappear on her like some sort of cruel dream.

“I didn’t die.” His words were soft as he pulled back and grabbed her arm, tugging her in and wrapping his arms around her. He tucked her head under his chin as he felt her fist thump against his side and chuckled. That was his girl.

“Tell that to someone who didn’t go to your funeral.” She responded, giving up on the abuse and curling into his chest.

“You were sorely missed, Son of Coul,” Thor assured the agent, raising a toast with a beer Clint handed him. Apparently there was to be celebratory drinking tonight.

“I only just broke you in, Agent,” Tony agreed. He attempted to loop an arm over Pepper’s shoulder, but she side stepped to go give Phil a hug. Darcy didn’t move so she got in on it to.

“Look at you, back from the dead and already you have two hot chicks wrapped around you.” Darcy commented, tucking her chin down so he wouldn’t see she was crying again. It didn’t matter he could hear it in her voice or that she was getting his shirt damp. That was all logic and she had no use for logic at the moment.

“I’m glad you’re back.” Pepper murmured, pressing a kiss to Darcy’s head and then going back to Tony, who was pouting, and tucking herself under his arm. She leaned up to kiss his cheek and gave him a warm smile so he knew she knew he had saved the day.

“I’m glad to be back,” He voice was as calm as ever, but the arms wrapped around Darcy pulled her tighter against him and she pressed further into him. He moved them into the living area and paused, Darcy still firmly pressed to his chest and quite unwilling to remove herself. He didn’t mind.

“You better not be taking off for some crazy ninja reason, not for at least a month.” Darcy informed him, leaning back to look up at his face. He smiled as he looked down at her, thin lines crinkling at the corner of his eyes. That was how you knew it was a real smile and not something he was just putting on for show. She found herself smiling back up at him, even though she was still a little teary.

“It’s be quiet lately, so you guys have all kinds of time to catch up,” Clint mentioned with a casual shrug. The curvy brunette whipped around, her hair brushing across Phil’s chest.

“You know what? No!” Darcy wrapped one hand around Phil’s wrist and stabbed a finger in Clint’s direction. “Fuck you, you just jinxed us, I hate you.” She glowered at him for a moment and then strode off in the direction of her bedroom, Phil smiling calmly and letting her lead him wherever she pleased.

“What’d I say?” Clint demanded as Natasha glared at him and Jane shook her head.

“Now we’re not gonna see them for another day at least,” Tony complained, smirking playfully down at Pepper when she bumped an elbow into his side.

“I have papers to go over,” Bruce stretched, his back cracking as he stood up and wandered back down the hall. He wasn’t sure why he’d been on the mission anyway, except they needed someone to stay with the vehicle and a proper show of force. He wondered idly if Darcy would still be willing to do yoga in the morning.

“I do not understand this ‘Jinx’ Lady Darcy was speaking of. In Asgard it is a curse, but Clint is not a sorcerer.” Thor was staring intently as Jane as she began to explain the phrase to the big blond.

“So I guess our next move is to get Bucky into the Avengers.” Steve commented quietly, standing beside Natasha. 

The redhead poured herself a glass of wine and leaned back against the counter, her eyes focused into the distance. After a moment's thought Natasha poured another glass of wine and silently handed it to Steve. She lifted her glass and gave him a single, slow nod as her eyes bored into his. Like this had always been her plan and she was glad Cap had finally caught on. She turned her eyes away from him and looked off into the distance, her face impassive as her fingers curled lightly around the wine glass and plans began to take form in her mind. Yasha was hers, after all. It was high time he was back where she could keep an eye on him.


	21. When The Lights Go Out We'll Be Safe And Sound

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to take this moment to give the biggest shoutout in the world to my Good Twin, the wondrous Tiziano. She keeps me sane, makes me write, makes me cookies, and enables my addiction to Criminal Minds. So when you read this and enjoy it (hopefully) realize that she made this happen. Also, she gets rid of my favorite word (that) because I use it in ridiculous abundance.

Darcy was up the next morning, pressing a kiss to Phil’s temple and mumbling something about coffee as she made her way out of the bed. She threw on Hulk pajama bottoms and an oversized shirt with Captain America’s shield painted on the front as she opened her, no, it was _their_ bedroom door now, and turned back to gaze at Phil’s sleeping form for a few seconds. He was relaxed and stealing her pillow to snuggle it in against his chest.

She’d kissed the scar on his chest last night, her hands shaking a tiny bit as she brushed them over his shoulders and asked him not to disappear. She wouldn’t have been able to get out of bed this morning if this had all just been a dream. She was still half afraid it would turn out that way, though. She closed the door to the room, breaking her line of site with the well toned back of one Agent Coulson. It was always nice to strip him out of his suits and find all that muscle underneath. Like unwrapping a Christmas present.

Hands rubbed against her eyes, knocking her glasses up her forehead, as she turned into the kitchen and bumped into a wide chest. She mumbled an apology and yawned as she went around him. Steve was usually the only one who was up this early in the morning, they had a routine at this point.

“Morning.” The masculine voice cut through the sound of liquid pouring into a cup. Darcy glanced up at the tall young man (if you didn’t count the years where he was a capsicle he wasn’t much older than she was). His smile was fond as he looked down at her.

“Good morning.” She reached for the second cup she’d brought and then paused for a moment before pulling her hand back and feeling a smile spread across her face. Phil could use the sleep, she’d make his coffee when he got out here.

“I figured you’d still be in bed.” Steve noted, drinking his own coffee and hopping up to sit on the counter. Darcy turned and cocked an eyebrow at him and Steve cleared his throat when he realized how that had sounded. He didn’t blush though, he was getting used to the comments of his fellow residents.

“I was afraid it would all be gone when I woke up, you know?” She sipped her coffee and stared at the empty cup she’d pulled out for Phil.

“Yeah, I know.” Steve responded after a moment, also staring at that cup. He had gone down expecting to die saving the world. Instead he’d woken up 70 something years later and everyone he’d loved had died.

Darcy hopped up on the counter and sat next to the big guy, leaning her head against his upper arm (he was too tall for her to use his shoulder). She didn’t say anything, what could you say about something like that? She wouldn’t promise she would always be here for him. She wouldn’t promise things wouldn’t happen like that again. She couldn’t promise him much of anything, really. So she didn’t.

“I’m glad he’s back.” The soldier told her after a few minutes of comfortable silence. A smile tugged it’s way across her face. It was a smile of delight and wonder and just a pinch of fear.

“Me too, Steve.” The words were half whispered and then broken off at the end by laughter as she hopped off the counter and set down her coffee before jumping up and down in place with a huge smile and more laughter spilling from her lips.

“You said coffee?” Phil voice was plaintive as he walked in the door, now wearing plain checkered pants and a blue shirt. Darcy threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressed her lips against his insistently. One of his hand slid into her long black curls and the other wrapped snuggly around her waist.

“I did, didn’t I?” She pulled back her head and shoulders to smile into his face, his hands still holding her close.

“Good morning, Steve.” Phil offered when he spotted the big man on the counter slowly sipping his own coffee and looking anywhere but their general direction.

“Good morning, Phil.” Steve cleared his throat and nodded over to the other man, relaxing a touch as Darcy disentangled herself from the other man. It hadn’t seemed right to watch such an intimate moment.

“Coffee!” Darcy bounced over to the pot and poured it into the cup she’d set aside, carefully stirring in two scoops of sugar before handing it to Phil and grabbing her own cup for a refill.

“You remembered.” Phil’s face was one of affection as he sipped at the hot liquid. Darcy smiled fondly back.

“I never forgot.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So for anyone that was curious, I write to music. So this is the soundtrack for Written In The Scars Of Our Hearts, in no particular order because I beleive in putting it on Random. 
> 
> It's Time by Imagine Dragons  
> These Times by SafetySuit  
> Every Teardrop is a Waterfall by Coldplay  
> Nothing Left To Lose by NEEDTOBREATHE  
> Get Over It by OK Go  
> Who Am I living For? by Katy Perry  
> Lost by Katy Perry  
> Oohs and Ahhs by NEEDTOBREATHE  
> Try by P!nk  
> Beside You by Marians Trench  
> Closer To The Edge by 30 Seconds To Mars  
> Bullet In My Hand by Redlight King  
> Kiss It Better by He Is We  
> Crash by Sum 41  
> Reason To Believe by Sum 41  
> Never Gonna Leave This Bed (acoustic version) by Maroon 5  
> Candles by Daughter  
> Unbreakable Heart by Three Days Grace  
> 'Til The Casket Drops by ZZ Ward  
> You Mean Everything To Me by Neil Sedaka  
> Last One Standing by Hot Chelle Rae  
> Psychotic Girl by The Black Keys  
> Wipe Your eyes by Maroon 5  
> Castle Walls by TI ft Christina Aguilera  
> Give Me Love by Ed Sheeran  
> Everything Has Changed by Taylor Swift  
> Fucking Perfect by P!nk  
> Fortune Teller by Maroon 5  
> Clouds by Zach Sobiek  
> I Summon You by Spoon  
> Happily Ever After by FM Radio  
> Smile by Nat King Cole  
> Great Vacations by Dirt Poor Robins  
> Little Miss by Sugarland  
> Ask Me How I Am by Snow Patrol  
> Burn Bright by My Chemical Romance  
> A Better Son/Daughter by Rilo Kiley  
> Don't Worry, Be Happy by Bobby McFarrin  
> We'll Be A Dream by We The Kings ft Demi Lovato

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't going to write a sequel to Kiss It All Better, but I was pleasantly surprised by all the responses and then the muse popped in and started beating me with a stick. So here you all go!


End file.
